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a-case-of-attachment · 7 months ago

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The Lamb & The Serpent

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Pairing: Lucifer Morningstar x sinner fem!reader

Rating: 18+

Warnings: Lucifer being a chaotic mess, mentions of sex, swearing, awkwardness, angst, Lucifers past relationship with Lilith, misunderstandings, all the angst, Lilith being a bit of a bitch, mistakes are made, heartbreak, jealous Lilith, or is she just manipulative, who knows, I do I know.

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Lucifer was a mess.

It had been days since Lilith had shown up on his doorstep, acting like it wasn’t a huge deal she was back and looking just as perfect as she had when she had walked out on him all those years ago. Things had gone badly. Admittedly Lucifer hadn’t handled the situation very well, probably making it ten times worse than it should have been. He had never been all that good at dealing with strong emotions though, neither his own nor other peoples. Nor was he any good with highly stressful situations and unfortunately for him, Lilith’s return covered both those things. It probably wouldn’t have gone so badly if you had been at his side keeping him grounded and calm, but he had managed to mess that up as well, potentially ruining one of the two good things he had going in his life.

Lucifer had still been struck dumb, staring at Lilith like the world was ending when you had come down the stairs, all sleep soft and wearing nothing but your matching duck slippers and the shirt he had been wearing the day before. He hadn’t noticed at first, seemingly frozen to the spot but he had seen Lilith’s eyes flick up to something behind him, her smile falling into a frown as she narrowed her eyes. It had been your confused call of “Lucifer?” that finally had him moving, slowly turning his head to look over his shoulder at you. Your eyes franticly moved between the two of them, searching for some kind of explanation and clearly growing more worried when you didn’t get one.

Hindsight was a beautiful thing and as Lucifer looked back on what had happened that day, he wished that he had gone to you then. He wished that he had wrapped you in his arms and sworn he hadn’t known she was coming back. He should have told you then and there that he loved you, that he wanted to spend the rest of forever with you and that there was nothing left between him and Lilith for you to be worried about. He should have done a lot of things, things that would have saved you and him a lot of pain and heartbreak, but he hadn’t and instead Lucifer had gotten to watch as hurt and embarrassment flashed across your face, Lilith’s voice loud and clear as she asked, “really Luci, a sinner?”

You had tugged down the hem of his shirt, your embarrassed blush deepening as you tried to hide the fact you were naked underneath. His shirt wasn’t quite long enough though and all you did was flash them a glimpse of the teeth marks he had left on your neck the night before; still angry and red despite having been done hours ago. Lucifer didn’t know what Lilith had done but your eyes had snapped to her, going wide as you pressed a hand over the marks on your neck. Tears welled up, clinging to your lashes and threatening to fall but you had been quicker, hurriedly insisting that you “should go,” before you had turned away from them, disappearing up the stairs as quickly as you could whilst pulling the back of his shirt down.

He had just stood there, staring at the spot you had been and failing to understand what was going on. This wasn’t how the day was supposed to go. Lucifer had plans, had wanted to spend the day wrapped within your arms and basking in the love and happiness that you inspired within him. Everything was wrong though, that happiness having vanished the moment he opened the door. It was like the last eight years hadn’t happened, Lucifer right back at the beginning of the end for his and Lilith’s relationship. He felt like a hollowed-out shell, mind numb and empty as he continued to exist who no purpose or direction in his life, alone and unwanted. Lucifer knew that wasn’t true though. Things had changed so much since Lilith had left; he had changed. He wasn’t the same sad and broken man he had been, having found a new lease of life with Charlie, the hotel and you. He knew all this and yet that didn’t change a thing, Lucifer was still adrift within the darkness of his mind, trapped in the past and watching his future slip away.

Delicate fingers curled around his wrist, a thumb gently rubbing circles against the delicate skin. Wordlessly Lucifer turned back toward Lilith, eyes fixed on where they were touching. Her fingers were cool, her pail lilac skin in stark contrast against the dark black of his own. Before, when they had still been happy and in love this had meant everything to him. He had craved her touch, lighting up like a star when she so much as brushed a finger against his. After she had left Lucifer had longed for it, dreamed about feeling it one last time and crying when the memory of it had started to fade. He had been a mess to start with, missing her like he had lost a limb, but as the years had passed he had come to terms with it, missing the closeness of another more than her specifically. Now it felt like a band of ice around his wrist, a chain that weighed him down and dragged him back to the past where he desperately didn’t want to be.

It hadn’t felt like they had been stood there that long but the sound of hurried steps on the stairs said otherwise, Lucifer so caught up in his head that you had enough time to get dressed and pack the small bag you had slung over your shoulder. He had turned to look at you, Lilith’s icy cold grip still in place and chasing away his natural heat. Lucifer didn’t feel right, all out of sorts and halfway between loosing control and shutting down completely. Maybe if he had a better grip on his mental state, he would have shaken Lilith off, dropped down to his knees in front of you and begged for you to stay. He didn’t though and when he turned to look at you all he found was resignation and loss, your gaze focused on where he and Lilith touched.

You didn’t even look at him as you walked past, head down and eyes fixed firmly on the floor. Not even when he said your name, sounding just as desperate and lost as he felt. You did stop though, head turned ever so slightly in his direction so you could tell him that “its ok Lucifer, just, we’ll talk later yeah?” You don’t stick around long enough for him to answer, pressing yourself against the wall just to be as far away from Lilith as you can. Without even a glance backwards you disappeared down the street, pulling your hood up as you went to hide your ears. It wasn’t until after you had gone that Lucifer realised that you had still had his shirt on, the slightly rumbled fabric only just visible under your jacket.

It cracked his heart to watch you go, the feeling that he had just lost something important sinking into him like a weight. It’s to much like watching Lilith walk out all those years ago, except this time Lucifer doesn’t want to let you go. Doesn’t want to just stand there and let this happen because he doesn’t want to lose you. Doesn’t want to wake up seven years from now alone and depressed, hating himself for not doing something to keep you by his side. He can’t go through that again, he won’t. Lucifer loves you, more than he thought he would ever be able to love another again. If he could tell you that, if he could make you understand the depths of his devotion to you than maybe you wouldn’t look at him like he had ripped your heart out and trodden on it. Maybe you would say it back to him and Lucifer would get to hold you in his arms again.

He doesn’t even realise his halfway out the door until Lilith’s grip tightens, your name dying on his lips as he snapped his head back to glare at her. He had been halfway through demanding she let go when Lilith had cut him off, her voice gentle and calming as she urged him to “let her go Lucifer. You’ll only make things worse for her if you make a scene out on the street, especially looking like that.” It’s only then that Lucifer really notices his state of dress. Feeling exposed and embarrassed Lucifer had curled in slightly on himself, wrapping his arms around his chest in an attempt to hide his half-undressed state. It was stupid, Lilith had seen him with far less on before but now he felt vulnerable, ashamed of the state he was in. Not because of what he had obviously been doing with you to get in this state but because of Lilith herself. She looked immaculate, not a hair out of place or a single smudge to her makeup. She looked every bit the queen of Hell, stood tall and proud like everyone was beneath her and in that moment Lucifer felt just that, his fears and inadequacies come rushing forward and swallow him whole.

Lilith was right. If he went after you now, he would only make things worse for you. He was good at that, making things worse despite his best intentions. You were clearly hurt, thinking Heaven knows what about him and why Lilith was at his door. You had needed him to reassure you of your place in his life and his feelings towards you, but he had done nothing like the pathetic coward he was. He didn’t deserve you, had known it all along yet he had still pursued you, somehow managing to convince you to give him your time and affection but all it had gotten you was hurt, and it was all his fault. He never wanted to hurt you, never wanted to be the reason you looked so lost and broken and yet here he was. The very reason you had fled his home with tears in your eyes after having given him one of the best nights of his life. Why was he like this? Everything he loved always got twisted around and turned into shit, like his very touch was a plague on all of creation.

So lost in his darkening thoughts, Lucifer didn’t even realise he had been moved away from the door and led into the parlour until Lilith was gently pushing him down onto the couch, her ice-cold hands pressing down on his shoulders until he slumped back into the plush seat. She sunk down next to him, close and yet somehow miles away. They sat in silence for a while, Lucifer trying to keep his tears at bay so he didn’t seem even more pathetic than he already did. He was the first to speak, unable to stand the silence a moment longer. His voice sounded as small and broken as he felt, it nothing more than a whisper as he asked her “why are you here Lilith? Why now?”

As it turned out Charlie was the reason she had come back, having heard about the hotel and the fight with Heaven that their daughter had led. Lilith had been worried and impressed, proud of Charlie for standing up for what she believed was right whilst afraid of how Heaven would retaliate with Adam dead at the hands of a sinner. Lucifer had sat there, listening to Lilith talk about Charlie, the hotel and Hell like she hadn’t been gone for almost eight years, not really paying attention as his mind began to fill with static. It was all just pointless noise to him, Lucifer mindlessly humming and nodding along at what he hoped were all the right points. He felt numb, hollowed out and empty. This morning he had been so happy, full of hope and excitement for the future but now it was all gone, Lucifer unable to drag those feelings back up despite how badly he wanted to.

He wanted to go back to this morning, to the very moment he had opened his eyes and realised you were in his arms. He would do things so much differently. He would have woken you up there and then to tell you how much he loved you, told you of his intentions to make you his queen one day and asked for your permission to scream his devotion to you from his window for all of Hell to hear. He wouldn’t have gone downstairs, definitely wouldn’t have answered the door no matter how loudly or persistently Lilith had knocked. Lucifer would have stayed wrapped up in you, safe in your embrace and completely ignorant of the world beyond his bedroom walls. Maybe then you would still be here with him. Maybe then Lucifer wouldn’t feel like he was already losing you before he even had the chance to truly have you.

Charlie had turned up at the door not even an hour after you had left, eyes wide and full of disbelief as she stared at Lilith like she wasn’t sure if her mother was real or not. Apparently when you had arrived back at the hotel you had run straight into Charlie, barely managing to get out that “your mums back in town,” before you practically ran off in the direction of your room. Charlie hadn’t stopped to think things through, running all the way to Lucifers home to find out if you had been telling the truth.

Not wanting Charlie to see him in such a state, Lucifer had simply waved his hand and he had been stood there in his suit, his hair perfectly quaffed and not a single trace of flour to be found. It hadn’t been till later that Lucifer had realised his rushed gesture had also gotten rid of the melted candles and flower petals from the night before, his heart clenching painfully at the fact that it was all gone. His night of love and passion with you swept away like it was nothing. Like it was something shameful to be hidden away from those closest to him.

It had been easy enough for Lucifer to fake a smile, greeting Charlie with a level of enthusiasm he really couldn’t muster. She had given him a confused and worried look, but it had been easy enough to direct her attention onto Lilith, Charlie eager to fill her mother in on everything she had missed. For hours Lucifer had listened to Charlie talk about everything and anything that had happened in her life since Lilith had left, skipping no detail though she often got ahead of herself and had to backtrack so what she was saying made sense. The whole time Lucifer had said nothing, fake smile still in place as he summoned cake and tea periodically throughout the day. Charlie tried to get him involved but his short one-word answers didn’t really open up the conversation. The only thing that got any sort of reaction from him was the mention of you, Charlie excitedly telling Lilith about how nice you were and how helpful you had been with the hotel, completely oblivious to the fact Lucifer had gone rigid at the mention of your name.

Lilith had seemed worryingly interested in you, shooting Lucifer knowing looks that had him wanting to sink into the sofa and disappear. He felt judged, like Lilith was pulling apart every little thing about him and inspecting it for flaws, weaknesses that could be exploited. He didn’t want her attention on you, didn’t want you to feel the same level of uneasiness he did so he tried to move the conversation on, his laugh clearly fake and not hiding his nerves in the slightest as he insisted that Lilith didn’t want to hear about his personal life. Lilith had easily brushed off his attempts, asking if the “helpful little lamb at the hotel is the same one I found half naked on your stairs this morning? I must say Lucifer she looked quite, ravished. Do you take all the hotel staff home or just this one in particular?” Charlie had blushed at that, falling uncomfortably silent as Lucifer had covered his face with a hand, his cheeks burning red with embarrassment.

He knew what he should say, that he should tell Lilith that it was none of her business because she had been the one to leave him eight years ago and disappear from Hell, even though she insisted she had been down in Gluttony the whole time, witch was one of the biggest lies Lucifer had ever heard and that was saying something. He should tell her that he had moved on, that he loved you and that what she was implying was so wrong it wasn’t in the same universe. Lucifer knew exactly what he should tell Lilith but just like every other time his words failed him and all he could get out was a meek pathetic sounding “she’s nice.” Even Charlie was looking at him like he had gone mad, probably not understanding why he wasn’t gushing about yours and his relationship like he tended to, and Lucifer did want to do that. Wanted to scream his devotion to you from the rooftops but Lilith’s knowing gaze over her teacup had him faltering, not wanting to share any more of his relationship with his ex-wife than already had been.

By the time Charlie was getting ready to leave it was late and Lucifer was exhausted, wanting nothing more than to crawl into bed and hide under his duvet as he finally got the chance to talk to you. That was if you were still awake and if you accepted his call. His plans to grovel for forgiveness were quickly brought to an abrupt end though when Charlie had asked Lilith where she was planning on staying. When Lilith had said she would just go to a hotel Charlie had obviously offered her own, excited to show Lilith everything she had been working on. Lucifer though had panicked at the suggestion, frantically blurting out that she could stay “here! Lilith can uh stay here. In the house. With me. Here’s fine. Yes, it is. No need to go all the way to the hotel when there’s a perfectly fine bed upstairs. NOT my bed. A different one. At the other end of the house. But still here, and not the hotel.” He was rambling, he knew that, but he couldn’t have Lilith going to the hotel. Not when you were there.

Charlie had been reluctant about it all, but Lilith had agreed and soon enough it had just been Lucifer and Lilith stood in the hallway, Charlie having headed back to the hotel with a promise that they would come visit so she could give Lilith the grand tour. It had been awkward, Lucifer feeling like he was trapped in a cage with a wild animal that was sure to attack at just the slightest movement. Lilith had been the one to break the silence, asking about her room and reluctantly Lucifer had led her up the stairs, feeling very much like a man on the way to the gallows as he went straight to her old suites. She had thanked him for letting her stay, even going as far as to tell him that it had been “nice to see you again Luci.” He had mumbled out some sort of reply along the same lines, bidding her good night before quickly heading to his own room.

It looked exactly the same as it had when he had left it that morning, except instead of you in his bed it was just the blanket he had conjured for you, haphazardly thrown across the wrinkled sheets. Lucifer didn’t even bother to get undressed, crawling onto his bed and cuddling the plush blanket to his chest. It still smelt of you, of the night before and the morning after, of all his hopes and dreams for the future he so desperately wanted with you.

He had tried to call you, laying on his back and staring up at the ceiling as he listened to the phone ringing and ringing. It wasn’t until the third time he tried calling that you picked up except it hadn’t been you. Well, not just you. Angel Dusts voice had been the loudest, loudly proclaiming that “I don’t care if he’s the king of this shit hole, I’ll tell him exactly where he can shove his... HEY! Watch where your grabbing,” before the line went dead. Lucifer tries calling back, but it doesn’t connect, and he’s left feeling defeated, the phone falling from his grip as he rolls back over. He could go to the hotel, but he doubts that would end well. He doesn’t want to upset you any more than you clearly already are and there’s always the chance that Angel will try and shoot him on sight. Not that it would do anything more than tickle, but he highly doubted you or Charlie would appreciate him dropping Angel Dust through a portal to the other side of Pentagram City.

Sighing Lucifer curled tighter around the blanket, burying his face into the plush fabric and breathing in the slowly fading smell of you. He clings to it like somehow that will stop you from slipping through his fingers, like if he holds on tight enough you wouldn’t possibly be able to leave him. What if it’s not enough though? He’s hurt you, his failure to act causing you to flee like there was already nothing to keep you here. By giving you time to think is he just making it easier for you to walk away, thinking that he doesn’t care? But if he showed up at the hotel, desperate and close to breaking would you finally see that he just isn’t worth it? Feeling like nothing he could do would be right Lucifer pressed his face deep into the blanket and silently he cried out his frustration and pain, his whole body shaking with every sob and sharp breath.

The next day didn’t go any better, but it didn’t get any worse. He feels exhausted, not having been able to get any sleep the night before as his guilt and self-loathing had gotten the better of him. He truly hated himself for how he had delt with things the day before, feeling that he had not only let you down but himself as well. He needed to fix things, make sure you understood that his behaviour yesterday didn’t have anything to do with any feelings you thought he still might harbour for his ex-wife and everything to do with his delicate mental state and eons worth of feeling like he was incapable of doing anything right. Lilith’s unexpected arrival had taken him back to that and instead of standing his ground Lucifer had crumbled, taking you with him.

He does try and call you again, several times but just like the night before they don’t connect, and Lucifer begins to sink further into himself. He lets his wings drape across him, blocking off the world along with most of the light. He wallows in the darkness, self-pity getting the better of him as he lets every mistake he had ever made since the dawn of time replay in his mind like a greatest hits reel. He spends the day like that, still clinging to the blanket and making himself feel a thousand times worse. No one bothers him, not even Lilith and though he hopes that by some miracle you will come through the door he knows it won’t happen, halfway convinced that this is just another level to his punishment for defying Gods wishes. It seemed fitting that he would be sent someone so perfect he couldn’t help but falling madly in love with them only for them to be snatched from his grasp when he was at his happiness, and it be all his fault.

At some point Lucifer does manage to get some sleep, having cried himself to sleep, to exhausted to keep going. He’s woken up only a few hours later by someone knocking on his door, Lilith’s voice slightly muffled as she calls through the thick wood that she was “going out. Charlote wants to introduce me to her friends and show me this hotel of hers.” Lucifer is up and out of the bed in seconds, practically tripping over his feet and blankets in his desperation to get to the door. He yanks it open, frantically calling out that he’s “coming! To the hotel. I’m coming to the hotel as well.” Lilith’s only a couple of steps down the hall, her surprise quickly morphing into a wicked smile that has Lucifer thinking that he might have made a mistake by being so franticly insistent that he come with her. It’s just, you're at the hotel.

Lucifer missed you, probably an unhealthy amount considering it had only been two days since he had last seen you but that didn’t make it any less true. He wanted to see you and the easiest way to do that would be to go with Lilith to the hotel and if he could function as some sort of buffer between the two of you then that was even better. Lilith’s interest in you had worried him and Lucifer didn’t want her to start interrogating you like you had committed some sort of crime by being with him. More than anything though Lucifer doesn’t want you feeling uncomfortable in your own home, and Lilith being there was sure to leave you feeling uneasy.

It wasn’t just to act as your knight in a white suit though, Lucifer was hopeful that by going to the hotel he would be able to fix whatever damage his actions or lack there of had caused. He wanted to get you alone, preferably before tea and whilst Lilith was off with Charlie having her tour of the hotel. Lucifer would probably be able to bribe Nifty to chase off Angel Dust as well, insuring he would have the time to talk to you and hopefully be able to convince you to give him a second chance. He was terrified that he had already messed things up beyond repair though and that cornering you in the hotel would just get him a slap and a demand to leave you alone. If you did say it was over Lucifer would accept that. Sure, he would be heartbroken, but he didn’t want to cause any more problems for you. But if there was even a glimmer of hope that things weren’t over for the two of you than Lucifer would grasp it with both hands, determined to prove himself to you.

Lilith had made a comment about his dishevelled state, but Lucifer had been to focused on his plan to really register any ill intent behind her words, agreeing that he was “a bit of a mess.” All it took was a snap of his fingers and Lucifer was ready to go, not a single hair out of place and his suit and shirt wrinkle free. Lilith had been watching him, brows furrowed as Lucifer practically bounced down the stairs. He couldn’t help it; he was excited to see you and full of hope once more.

He had opened a portal to the hotel, trying to put as much distance between himself and Lilith as he possibly could just to emphasise that they weren’t actually together even if they arrived together. Lucifer had not been expecting to find the parlour already full, seemingly everyone currently staying at the hotel filling the space. Lucifer had frozen, eyes wide and unsure what to do with the sudden attention, his happy smile faltering. Lilith though had just breezed through the portal, all smiles and kind words as she greeted the sinners excited to see their Queen like she knew them all personally. Lucifer had shuffled in behind her, uncertain and awkward as the portal closed behind him and suddenly feeling out of his depth, having avoided any sort of large gatherings since before Lilith had left.

He had forgotten how much the residents of Hell had flocked to her, hypnotised by her voice and desire to raise Hell up from the cesspit of sin that it was. She truly was beautiful when in her element, glowing with a confidence that Lucifer had always been in awe of. She had always been a magnificent performer though, able to turn a crowd with just a smile and now was no different. Now that he wasn’t so blinded by his infatuation for her, Lucifer could see Lilith’s interactions with the sinners for what they were, a performance designed to draw people in and win them over. That wasn’t to say that she didn’t genuinely care or believe in what she was saying but she just kept a part of herself back, her true self hidden from the masses. No one else seemed to notice, not even Charlie as she excitedly introduced Lilith to Vaggie and the others, practically vibrating as she jumped from one introduction to another, pulling Lilith along behind her as she went.

As the crowd moved Lucifer finally got a glimpse of you, sat at the bar with Angel Dust and looking down at the drink in your hand like your whole world had fallen apart. You had dark circles under your red rimmed eyes, a clear sign that you had been crying. His heart tightened painfully at that, knowing he was the cause and wanting to punch himself for it. Angel leant in, whispering something that had your head snapping up and eyes going wide as you locked your gaze with him.

It was like everything else around him vanished, Lucifers entire world narrowing down to you. It had only been a couple of days, but Lucifer felt like he hadn’t seen you in forever, his heart swelling with longing whilst it cracked with regret and shame. You seemed just as trapped by his gaze as he was yours, his own feelings of longing reflected back at him but instead of regret he found only resignation and acceptance. You offered him a sad shaky smile before looking away and turning your back on him. It felt like an end, like everything Lucifer had wanted was slipping through his fingers like sand. No. That couldn’t happen, he wouldn’t allow it. You couldn’t just give up like that, like what you had shared hadn’t meant enough to you to even try and fight for it. Lucifer was halfway across the still crowded room before he even realised he was moving, trying not to be too aggressive as he pushed sinners out of his way in his haste to get to you.

Lucifer wasn’t quite quick enough though, Charlie making it to you before Lucifer could. She smiled brightly as she introduced you to Lilith, spinning you round and into her side so she could sling her arm over your shoulders in an awkward hug. Your initial shock didn’t last long and in the blink of an eye you were offering Lilith a bright smile, bowing your head slightly as you greeted her with surprisingly genuine politeness. Lucifer got there just in time for Lilith to answer your greeting, her violet eyes dragging over you in obvious appraisal as she told you that “Charlie has told me so much about you.” You and Lucifer both flinch slightly when Lilith says that, making it blindingly obvious that Lucifer hadn’t been the one to bring you up.

You recover from the metaphorical blow first, eyes dull and smile forced as you spoke about how happy you were to be helping Charlie with the hotel and all the hard work she had been putting in to making it work. It’s awkward, and uncomfortable for everyone involved apart from Lilith who doesn’t seem to notice you are looking at something over her shoulder instead of at her, nor that Charlie’s eyes are darting between the three of you or that Lucifer has tugged his hat down slightly, looking pained and embarrassed as he tried to catch your eye to no avail.

He can’t take it anymore, wanting to get you as far away from this train wreck of a situation before it gets any worse. His nervous laughter is loud and awkward when he cuts Lilith off before she has a chance to speak again, franticly trying to turn her in the opposite direction as he asks Charlie “how about that tour huh? Lots to see before Lilly’s got to head home.” He doesn’t realise the mistake he’s made until he sees the gleam in Lilith’s eyes and his stomach drops like the floor has just disappeared out from under him and he’s plummeting down into the unknown darkness below.

Lucifer hadn’t meant to use the old nickname; it just having slipped out in his desperation to get her away from you, but it was worse than just that. So much worse because Lilith had said “It’s lovely to be home again. I really had missed it up here in Pride and being back at the manor with Lucifer again, it’s just like old times.” With every word Lilith said Lucifer could see the light dimming in your eyes, your ears twitching downwards and smile clearly starting to strain. Lucifer tries to tell you that it’s not how it sounds but he can’t even get your name out before Lilith is looping her arm through his and pulling him along as she starts her tour of the hotel, Charlie quick to catch up with Vaggie not far behind. Craning his neck round Lucifer hoped to catch your attention but what he sees is you downing the drink you had been holding before practically slamming the glass down on the bar and quickly making your escape in the opposite direction they were going. Angel Dust is the one that catches Lucifer looking, shooting him a mean glare and using all four hands to flip him off before he goes after you.

Lucifer doesn’t pay attention on the tour, letting Charlie talk and Lilith lead him along by the arm. He’s too busy berating himself to listen to what’s going on let alone take part, mind firmly stuck on you and the dull emptiness you had looked at him with. How could he have been so stupid? He should have realised what him letting Lilith stay at the manor would look like to everyone else and especially you. He had been so desperate to keep her away from you that he hadn’t even stopped to think about the damage it would cause letting her stay with him for Heaven knows how long. Of course it would upset you. He would be angry too if you had an ex-partner move in next door to you at the hotel out of the blue. He really was an idiot. An idiot that was making everything worse just by existing. He really needed to talk to you, get all these mistakes and misunderstandings sorted out before they became too big to fix. He just needed to go find you, hopefully somewhere private where the two of you could be alone and just talk it out though if you wanted to scream, he didn’t think he would begrudge you that, not after how he had acted.

Lucifer had tried to slip away when Charlie had started talking about how she was planning on filling all the empty rooms. He had tried to be as discreet as possible, gently slipping his arm out from under Lilith’s and taking a small half step backwards. That was as far as he had gotten though before Lilith was grabbing hold of his hand and quite literally pulling him into the conversation, turning everyone’s attention on to him as she had asked about his role within the hotel. He had tried to laugh it off, insisting that he was just the financier but then Charlie had started insisting he was more than that, tugging him free of Lilith’s hold and having him lead the tour with her.

Any other time Lucifer would be ecstatic, proud of his little girl and everything she had achieved. Not that he wasn’t proud of her, but he couldn’t help but feel that with every step he took further into the hotel he was losing his chance to make things right with you. She looked so happy though, arm looped through his and smiling brightly as she told Lilith some of the tamer stories she had of the current guests. He couldn’t ruin that by running off, no matter how badly he wanted to. So, Lucifer had stayed, enjoying the time spent with his daughter and trying not to think how every second he spent casually touring the hotel was another second you had to convince yourself that Lucifer wasn’t worth the time you had given him.

It was late once the tour was over, it having taken a lot longer this time round compared to when Lucifer had been the one being shown around. He couldn’t blame Charlie for being excited and wanting to show the place of, but they hadn’t needed to look at every floor, over half of them just the same generic corridor with rows of identical empty rooms. Feeling frustrated and desperate Lucifer had been quick to usher Lilith through the portal, practically shoving her the last few steps before calling out that “I’m going out. Don’t wait up. Bye,” and letting the thing snap closed before she could say anything. Charlie and Vaggie had been shocked at his behaviour, but Lucifer had waved them off as he took off running towards your room. He was a man on a mission, and he wasn’t about to let anyone get in his way. He was going to your room, and he was going to explain everything to you, grovel on his knees for forgiveness if he had to and make it 1000% clear that he was not interested in starting anything with Lilith again. You were the one he wanted, not her.

The problem was you weren’t in your room, Lucifers insistent knocking either going unnoticed or ignored. He had panicked a little then, worry creeping up on him as he tried to think of where else you could be. He had seen you with the spider earlier so maybe you were still with him? It was a bit of a long shot considering how long ago he had seen the two of you together, but Lucifer didn’t really stop to think about that, spinning on his heals and heading down to the bar in search of Angel Dust and hopefully you.

That hope is short lived because when Lucifer skids round the corner he finds the bar practically empty, the only person inside being Husk who was slumped over the bar, halfway through a bottle of presumably cheap booze. Lucifer startled him when he slams down his cane on the bar top, demanding to know if he knew where you were. He wasn’t being very polite, but Lucifer was desperate, feeling like every second that went by was a second he was closer to loosing you entirely. Husk had given him a look that Lucifer could only describe as disappointed, sighing heavily as he told Lucifer that you were “out. Angel Dust and Cherrie decided she needed to let loose after that shit show this morning.” That hurts, Lucifer wincing at the reminder of how awkward things were when he and Lilith had arrived at the hotel that morning. He sinks down onto a barstool, arms wrapping around his head and crushing his hat as he let his head smack against the wooden bar top.

Out. You were out with Angel Dust and that cyclops women doing Heaven knows what and all because he was too much of a wreck to stand up for himself and deal with things the correct way. He could go after you, could demand that Husk tell him exactly what bar or club you had gone to but in the end what would that accomplish? He would make a scene, probably make a fool of himself for all of Hell to see and make things worse for you in the long run. But what other choice did he have? To just sit around at the bar and wallow in self-pity like the pathetic idiot he is, waiting for you to return to the hotel just so he could ambush you as soon as you came through the door? Angel Dust probably wouldn’t let him get within ten feet of you, uncaring that Lucifer was the king of Hell and knowing that he would never hurt the sinner because that would upset Charlie.

He could just leave. Go back home and wait till the morning before trying again. The thought of going back to the manor with Lilith made his stomach turn slightly, not wanting to be trapped in there with her and all the painful memories her presence pulled up from the dark recesses of his mind. It wasn’t just that though. Lucifer got the horrible feeling that if he left without doing anything at all that would be it. There would be no chance to talk and fix things in the morning. These last few months of happiness gone in a flash, leaving Lucifer all alone once more.

Husk doesn’t let him wallow for long, practically slamming a glass of some deep amber looking liquid down in front of him. He doesn’t look happy but that’s normal for him and Lucifer accepts the drink with a mumbled “thank you,” before taking a tentative sip of the smoky liquid. He promptly almost chokes on it when Husk speaks, eyes going wide as he tells Lucifer that he isn’t “one of those bar tenders that listens to your problems and dishes out advice. They're your hang ups and fuck ups not mine, deal with them yourself. That being said, that girl cares a lot about you, and she deserves a helluva lot better than being dumped like hot trash as soon as your ex come back around after up and leaving your sorry ass. So how about you ditch the pity party and actually fix your fuck up whilst you still can because, taking a girls virginity then moving your ex-wife back in the morning after? That’s fucked up even for the King of this shit hole.” Lucifer sits there, eyes wide and grip tight enough on his glass that it starts to crack. Little fractures that spread across the glass like spiderwebs.

Was that really what people thought? That he had been using you as a stand in and that as soon as Lilith had shown up again, he had just abandoned you for her? Was that what you thought? He sees you then, that resigned and accepting look in your eyes as you stare back at him. It’s like you had been expecting this to happen and had come to terms with it long before you had needed to. This whole time had you always been waiting for him to break your heart, expecting him to want nothing else from you other than to be a stand in for his estranged wife? His wedding ring glints in the light, a cruel reminder of his painful past and rapidly disappearing future. He suddenly understands why you had never brought it up, had never asked him to take it off. You had never been expecting him to, accepting that when it came to Lilith she would always be his greatest love and that you would never come close to holding a place like that in his heart.

The glass shatters in Lucifers hand, liquid spilling across the bar top as shards dig painfully into his palm. Vaguely he hears Husk cursing but Lucifers to preoccupied to really hear it. You had it all wrong. Yes, Lucifer had loved Lilith and despite everything they had been through and how her very presence reminded Lucifer of all his short comings a part of him would always care for her. She was the mother of his child, his first love, his first everything and they had eons of happiness together, but it hadn’t been enough to survive the worst of times. Lucifer had moved on, his feelings for Lilith now more like that of a dear old friend then a lover.

Lucifer loved you. Was madly, deeply and irrevocably in love with you. He would bring paradise to Hell just to see you smile. He would pull the very stars from the sky to show you that they paled in comparison to your eyes. He would build you a grand palace if you asked, would fill every room with rare jewels and riches. He would have the very streets of Hell scrubbed and cleaned so you didn’t have to walk amongst the filth and bloodshed. Lucifer would grant your every wish and desire. He would let you sit upon his throne whilst he curled at your feet, head in your lap and content to have your fingers in his hair. He would give you anything including himself, would even cut out his heart and offer it to you on a silver platter if that was what you need from him to truly even begin to understand what you meant to him.

He’s actions had been rash and desperate, clouded over by the past and his own failings. He would make it right though, would fix his fuck up as Husk had so eloquently put it. He was right after all, you deserved better than thinking you were anything less than everything to him. Shaking the glass from his hand Lucifer had stood, nodding his head and thanking him for “the advice,” before turning and heading towards the hotel doors. He ignored the other mans shout from behind him, his mind preoccupied with his forming plan as he started on his walk back to the manor.

That night Lucifer moved out of the manor and into his rooms at the hotel.

Lilith had been waiting for him when he returned to the manor. Though she made it look like she had just been enjoying a glass of wine and a book in the parlour, Lucifer knew she had been just passing time till he came back, probably expecting him to be heartbroken and so in need of comfort that he would just walk back into her arms. Well, she was wrong. Lucifer wasn’t heartbroken, not yet anyway. Clearing his throat Lucifer had stood in the hallway with his head held high and determined gaze fixed on Lilith who had turned slightly to look at him over the back of the sofa. His voice had been clear and steady as he told her that he was “moving out, tonight. I’m going to stay at the hotel for now until another permanent living arrangement can be made. The manor is yours, do with it what you will.”

Lilith had looked a little taken-a-back at his statement, gracefully rising to her feet and trying to dissuade him from his decision as she came round the back of the sofa. Lucifer had stayed firm though, holding a hand up and cutting her off before she could even get close to convincing him to stay. Instead, he was honest with her, his stern determination softening slightly as he explained that he “should have moved out years ago. This place holds to many memories, not all of them good and I have been keeping myself locked away in her for too long. It’s time I let go of the past and moved on with my life and I can’t do that here.” The with you goes unspoken but Lucifer can see the flash of understanding that lights up Lilith’s eyes. She leans back against the sofa, her hands curling around the edge and nails digging in slightly. Neither of them says anything, don’t really even look at each other as they both process what Lucifer had just said.

He hadn’t been planning on saying it but that didn’t make it any less true. Lucifer had been holding onto the past in many ways he hadn’t even realised, not just the ring but the house as well, it still being the exact same as it had been when Lilith had left. Nothing had changed for so long, Lucifers life stagnant even as he clung onto a time long since passed. But things were changing now and for the better. His relationship with Charlie was getting better every day and he was finally starting to take more of an active role as King of Hell, and then there was you. His sweet little lamb who had been the first person in a long time to make him feel like he was enough just as he was. Lucifers life had been good, or at least it had been right up until a couple of days ago, but Lucifer was going to fix it, and this was the first step to doing so.

Lilith was the one to break the silence, finally looking at Lucifer as she asks, “she isn’t just a fling, is she?” He’s not expecting that, eyes wide in his surprise but it fades quickly, Lucifer smiling his first genuine smile in two days. He doesn’t hesitate this time, his voice found as he admits that “no, she isn’t.” Lilith takes it all surprising well, telling him that she’s glad he had found someone who makes him happy and admitting that she had been “rather jealous when I first saw her. You will apologise to her for me won’t you Luci? I wasn’t particularly welcoming, and I would hate for my behaviour to come between the two of you.” Of course, Lucifer assures her that he will, smiling brightly and trying to hide the small thrill he gets at knowing that how happy and in love he had been had made Lilith jealous. Lucifer does laugh though when Lilith asks him if you realise how lucky you are to have Lucifers love and devotion, insisting that he was the lucky one. You could have anyone you wanted but you had chosen Lucifer and that made him the luckiest person in all of Hell.

He and Lilith spend almost an hour talking after that, Lucifer telling her how you two had met and how he had gone about courting you. Lilith seems genuinely interested, laughing at his failed attempts at flirting and even teasing him about his incapability to realise when someone what flirting with him. It’s nice, reminiscent of eons ago when they had still told each other everything, open and honest in a way that they hadn’t been towards the end. It changes nothing about his decision though and before the hour can pass fully Lucifer is excusing himself to go pack, politely declining Lilith’s offer to help. They don’t say goodbye, Lilith offering him a hopeful “see you soon?” that he finds himself repeating back to her. Maybe not tomorrow or the day after but at some point? That would be nice. Maybe even a family dinner, especially considering it would now involve you and Vaggie. He didn’t doubt that it would be awkward to start with, but he had his own hopes that somehow it would all work out in the end.

It doesn’t take him all that long to pack, everything important boxed up and moved to the hotel with a snap of his fingers. It’s not like he had much of importance to take with him anyway. A few trinkets he had picked up over the centuries and things from Charlie’s childhood that had sentimental value. There were photos and paintings that he wanted to keep, like the one of Charlie in her strange gothic phase or the one of her as a baby sat on top of a large rubber duck and smiling brightly as she laughed. There were so many of her at different stages in her life, ones of him and the other sins as well as the few friends he had made down here but there were also ones of him, Lilith and Charlie that he couldn’t bear to part with, the three of them smiling and laughing together that were important and precious memories from his past. He didn’t think you would begrudge him those, but he didn’t want you to think his memories with you were any less important to him. He hoped that one day soon he would be able to place photos of you amongst them, your bright smile and infectious laughter lighting up his walls just like they did to his life.

Eventually all that’s left for him to take are the pyjamas you had gifted him along with his duck slippers and the blanket he had conjured for you. They’re all folded neatly, stacked in a little pile on his bed that he scooped up into his arms and holds close to his chest. He gives the room a once over, eyes lingering on the bed as he recalls how peaceful and content you had looked curled up on the sheets. He’s half tempted to take it with him, the memory of your first time together such a bright spot in his life that he doesn’t want to leave a single piece of it behind. It wasn’t the bed that had made your night together so perfect though and taking it with him would just be impractical. With his mind still full of you he had opened a portal and stepped through into his rooms at the hotel, not feeling even a speck of regret at his decision.

Once the portal is closed Lucifer places the pyjamas and slippers on his bed, fully intending to wear them when he got into it later. For now, he keeps hold of the blanket and makes his way out into the halls, heading towards your room once more. His nock is gentle and steady this time, but his heart is beating just as rapidly as he waits for you to answer. You don’t, clearly not yet back from wherever Angel Dust and Cherrie had taken you. That should worry him slightly, but he trusts you, knows that even angry and hurt the most you will do is have one to many drinks and he trusts Angel to look after you, his own reforming conscience preventing him from letting anything bad happen to you.

He should go but he had come here for a reason, and he didn’t see the harm in leaving the blanket in your room to find when you got back. Maybe you would even find comfort in it, curling up in the plush fabric like he had the night before. Lucifer tried the handle on a whim, not expecting the door to actually open and yet it does, the soft click sounding far too loud in the otherwise quiet corridor. He steps inside quickly, shutting the door behind him and grumbling about you being far too trusting for living in Hell. Lucifer fumbles for the light switch, eventually just giving up when all his fingers find are wall and door frame. Instead, he clicks his fingers, the lights coming on instantly and filling the space in a warm glow.

Lucifer has been in your room before but never alone and never without your permission to be there. He feels like he’s trespassing. Like at any second alarm bells are going to start going off and metal bars will spring up to cover the windows and door, trapping him inside until you finally come back and find him huddled in a corner. He knows that’s not going to happen but that doesn’t stop him from feeling like he’s doing something wrong by being here without you or your permission. Deciding that he had already messed up by coming in here Lucifer quickly marches across the room and places the blanket down on the end of your bed, a quick wave of his hand summoning a white and red rose that smells like candy apples that he gently placed on top of the folded fabric.

He's back out the door within minutes, lights off once more and hiding what he had done. He feel’s giddy and nervous as he makes his way back to his rooms, like a teenager leaving a love note in a crush’s locker. Lucifer is hopeful though, that somehow his offering will have you at his door before the night is over. Either to talk or to throw the blanket in his face, but still at his door none the less. All he needed was that chance. The chance to reach out and hold your hand and tell you he was sorry for the hurt he had caused. The chance to promise you that his heart was yours and offering to give it to you on a silver platter if that was what you needed to know his feelings were true. Whatever you needed from him Lucifer would give it to you willingly, would offer you the universe if it would offer him just a glimpse of your smile once more. Whatever it takes, Lucifer would show you where his love resided and hopefully start to build a future with you at his side. Together again and stronger for it.

So lost in his thoughts Lucifer did not see the violet eyes that watched him from withing the darkest shadows. As he disappeared around the corner the shadows shifted, taking form as they moved closer to the door he had come from. Pail lilac fingers curled around the handle, the door opening just enough for the shadow cloaked figure to slip through into the darkened room, the door closing silently behind it.

@viannasthings @loquacious-libra @misfitgirlwrites @nanamunath @cherry-cola-100 @a-okay-rj

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littledollll · 1 year ago

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hey sweetheart :'3 I was wondering if you were taking request. If you are would you be open to do a Lucifer x little angel reader. I just love your little fic if these and I'm always looking for more if them. I think I've read them all tho. So my idea was that maybe Lucifer and reader could have a fight I'll let you decide why. Then reader decide to go hide from Lucy and our favorite god starts panicking and all. Over all just really cute stuff 😊😊💖 Thank you for reading and have a nice day bby💕

The Gardens

Lucifer Morningstars x Little!angel!reader

A/n: man i just hope this is half decent. Got a little motivated to write about this idea when I got the request which made me very excited! I rarely let us see when R isn’t regressed which is kinda the point? But I think insights like this are really fun to write! (May 6)

A/n pt 2.: finishing this July 21 at 3am, where did I go wrong? I’m so sorry I took so damn long it’s insane bc i don’t even notice time passing. I was looking back at my old fics and noticed I’m always writing R going to sleep? I love that cuz some of my friends actually call me “sleepy” because apparently I’m always tired. (I am)

Warnings: a little arguing, Lucifer says some hurtful things, not much else. Just some sweet fluff after the hurt.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

“Im the judge here. I alone decide the punishments and how souls will be handled. You might be my partner but you hold no power over me or hell. These are not your decisions to make or have a say on.” It was an angry spew of words. Lucifer doesn’t like having their authority challenged and you were the one person who could do that. For the first time, your own opinions were voiced in their work, and Lucifer didn’t seem willing to listen or like it at all.

Never in your time living in hell had you and Lucifer clashed about something so much.. it hurt, not to be ironic but it hurt like hell. Lucifer had never spoken to you in such a way. Never before had they used their intimidation tactics on you.

Lucifer being unnecessarily stubborn didn’t help at all, as they refused to actually listen to your opinion or swallow their pride and compromise. Or simply speak to you like an equal. Their words almost stung. “You have no power here.” That’s what they meant. And you couldn’t bear to listen anymore or even respond after that.

After a certain point you just gave up and walked away, leaving whatever they were about to spit back, in the dust, mid-sentence, and then ending up with a confused shocked expression. No one gets to just walk away from The Devil.

The worst part was that you wanted to run to them. As if words and a voice laced with venom hadn’t just been thrown in your face. As if they’d protect you even from their own self. They’ve always been your safe space, your comfort.. but you couldn’t, not today, not after your argument.

At first they were fine with you just walking away. They admit to being stubborn and hard to talk to.. everyone needs a little space to think sometimes, right? But then hours and more hours passed and you still refused to show.. it’s like you were hiding from them. There’s nothing Lucifer hated more than the thought of that. Did they really mess up that badly? That you, the most forgiving and lovely being they’ve ever met, simply refused them?

They couldn’t possibly leave it like that. Let you believe they think regularly of you, like you aren’t the most important being in their life, like you aren’t their special angel. So settling their pride aside accompanied with a bit of anxiety, they set out to find you.

You had gone to your safe space.. hiding away physically and mentally, letting your much calmer but also a lot sadder, little self take control.

Lucifer searched high and low for you, all around the palace, going as far as to actually ask for help looking. And thankfully it occurred in their mind that there was always one place you went when you seek comfort, and that was the little hidden gardens of the palace.

And there you were. Quietly sitting by their most recently planted flowers, daisies in fact. They always claimed those flowers suited you perfectly, not just the look, but the meaning. Which included purity, innocence, new beginnings, joy and cheerfulness. All things they saw in you. All things they loved about you. But of course there’s more, so much more that they love.

“My angel..” their voice was a complete contrast to their earlier attitude. Cautious as they approached you but still with a rush to have you close. Lucifer was unsure you’d ever forgive them, but there was no way you could possibly resent them, maybe you should have, but it wasn’t in your heart to reject them, so you let them approach without scurrying away.

Lucifer got down to your level, kneeling down on the floor and holding their hands out for you, which you immediately took, being pulled into a tight hug, their wings wrapping around you, effectively hiding you from the world just because they knew you loved it so much. They pressed a kiss to your forehead before hugging you close again. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, my sweet angel…”

Not knowing how to respond, you nodded just a little as you nuzzled close to their shoulder, basking in the warmth and comfort of their hug. “I should’ve never said that.. never. And I promise you I didn’t mean a single word of it. I’m.. I’m in no way excusing myself, and my awfully hurtful words- but I’m just not used to this, angel..”

You could understand that.. there’s no being of higher power here in hell, even in the universe actually, no one but them and the very God that created and banished them. They’re not used to being challenged or disagreed with, and ever the sinner they are also quite prideful, even as an angel. “I’ve done this alone for so long.. of course there’s other lords.. and Mazikeen. But not even they step in when it comes to my decisions, and when you did- I felt questioned. Which I recognize should be much more frequent than it is, but it’s a new thing, and I responded very wrongly to it.”

Not for a moment did the soft tone leave their voice, a mere whisper as they hugged you and refused to let go. They’d apologize for eternity if you so requested it. But even in your headspace you could appreciate them taking accountability, and recognizing that it was wrong. Not just that it caused a bad reaction from you. “I’m working on it, I promise. Your opinion does matter to me, In whatever situation, your voice matters to me.”

It hurt, of course it hurt. But Lucifer is always sincere in their word, and they were willing to work together, that’s all that mattered to you. So you quite adorably mumbled out a little, ‘I forgive’, as you rest your chin on their shoulder. And Lucifer couldn’t be happier. “Thank you, my sweet angel.. but also, you can’t hide away from me like that, tiny. You had me running all over the palace looking for you like a maniac!” They said in a more playfully, less serious tone as they chuckled.

“Let’s make a deal, yeah?.. if anything of the sort ever happens again, can I trust that you’ll be in your little room? Even if we’re a little upset at each other I always want to know that you’re safe. I understand needing a moment to decompress and think, that certainly helped me a lot today. But I’d just like to know you’re safe and that we can talk when we’re ready to, how does that sound?” You giggled as their voice took a more playful tone and you nodded, moving away a little to look at them, an adorable little smile painted on your face. “Deals!!” You said, rather excited despite the topic.

Of course you were aware that it was indeed quite possible to run into more arguments and disagreements like this, and even more that you’d slip. But knowing how much they care for you and love you, how much they worry and want you to be safe was quite reassuring that no matter what problems you ran into there wasn’t a thing you couldn’t surpass with just a little talking and cuddles.

They nodded, placing a soft kiss on your temple and deciding just then to take a moment and sit outside with you, which was rare, for reasons neither you or they could quite place. “It’s a deal then..” they replied with a soft tone, and you could hear their smile as they spoke. It was surprisingly quiet, oddly peaceful being out here with you. They scolded themselves for not doing this sooner and made a mental note for next times.

Of course your regression was still a secret and hell can be a dangerous place but the gardens are safe enough, specially with Lucifer and your hound friend who always stayed near. After a few moments, your voice interrupted their train of thought. “luci likes birdies?” The question seemingly came out of nowhere which made them chuckle a bit. “I do. What’s going on in that cute little mind of yours to ask me that, sweet one?” Their tone was obviously amused.

“No birdies in hell! Want one.. like morphi!” It seems your mind was running elsewhere, curiosity of things you always wanted to question but didn’t. “You could have one.. how about a dove? Just like you are my little dove.” Lucifer smiled and placed a little kiss on the tip of your nose, making you giggle and shy away. You were quick to nod and respond with a slight tone of awe. “Dovs pretty!”

“As are you!” Lucifer was never one to make spur of the moment decisions.. well- not at least until you came along. But how could they ever say no to you? The little angel wants a hound and a dove, so let’s get them a hound and a dove. Lucifer sighed, not in an upset manner nor exhaustion. More so in content, amused with themselves for being so susceptible to you. “Well then. Looks like my little dove is getting their own..”

#gwendoline christie #lucifer sandman #little angel (lucifer x little!reader)#sandman lucifer x reader #the sandman #🕊️ anon #lucifer morningstar the sandman #the sandman lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer morningstar (the sandman)#the sandman lucifer morningstar #little angel #Little angel (Lucifer x little!angel!reader)

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dngrs-untld-hrshps-unnmbrd · 5 months ago

Text

Sweet Little Killer

Those big eyes, Cooper thought, his anger rising. Those big eyes of hers were glistening with tears, and twice as pretty for it. He wondered if she knew the effect she had on men with those soulful eyes of hers. If she did, she was damn well making those tears brim on her dark lashes on purpose, trying to wrap his withered heart around her pretty little finger.

As Ghoul and Lucy journey across the wastes to New Vegas both of them learn a helluva lot more about each other, and circumstances and mutual attraction drive them into each other's arms.

Start with Chapter One

CHAPTER FOUR

Lucy woke and stretched her arms over her head. With her eyes closed, she smiled and squeezed her thighs together, feeling the slipperiness between them and remembering Cooper’s fingers inside her.

Cooper. His name was Cooper.

She smiled even wider. How good it felt to know his name. Almost as good as it felt to be held by him, kissed by him, and be absolutely railed senseless by his fingers. It had probably been a long time since he’d told anyone his name. This was big for him.

With her eyes still closed, she reached out across the mattress only to encounter cold sheets. Sitting up, she saw Cooper standing at the end of the bed, already fully dressed and buckling on his gun belt.

‘Good morning,’ she said with a smile, and reached for his gloved hand and squeezed it.

Cooper glanced vaguely in her direction, but it was difficult to tell if he’d even looked at her with the brim of his hat set so low. He didn’t pull his hand from hers, but he walked away, and his loose fingers trailed out of her grip without squeezing her back.

‘I’ll be waiting outside.’ His voice was cold, and he closed the door behind him.

Lucy stared at scuffed door, wondering what just happened. Did she dream they’d been so close to each other last night? If she’d held his hand out of nowhere, Cooper would have made some sarcastic crack about not being her goddamn boyfriend.

Lucy got dressed, hurt and confusion filling her throat. She pulled on her new backpack, and when she opened the door, she saw Cooper leaning against the wall with his arms folded. Without a word, he turned and led them out of the settlement and into the desert.

Dogmeat was the only happy one that morning, trotting along with a big doggy smile and her tongue hanging out. They passed Radscorpion trails several times, and she expected Cooper to follow them like he’d done the previous day, but he just kept marching straight ahead.

‘I should kill some Radscorpions. I spent all my caps yesterday.’

Cooper didn’t even look around. ‘I have caps. Keep moving.’

Lucy gave a short, angry exhalation, and she stopped in her tracks. ‘What’s up with you? You’re not talking. You’re not looking at me. Did I do something wrong?’

He kept walking until he realized she was no longer following him and turned back to her. There was a long silence. ‘I didn’t know there was anything I needed to say.’

He didn’t call her darlin’ or vaultie or sweetheart. He’d never even said her name.

‘Good morning might have been nice,’ she retorted. ‘Did you sleep well. How are you feeling about today. I—I liked kissing you last night.’

Cooper put his hands on his hips and stared at the ground. With his head tipped forward like that she couldn’t see his eyes beneath the brim of his Stetson, but she sensed he was angry.

Now you’ve done it, vaultie . That’s what he’d said when he was holding her, as if she’d broken through his hard shell and he was going to be Cooper with her from now on, not the Ghoul.

Lucy wished she could hold onto her anger like he could, but it was all swept away by sadness and confusion. ‘We were getting somewhere, Cooper. Don’t lock me out. Talk to me, please.’

Cooper stood as still as uncaring stone, but his fingers were clenching and unclenching on his hips. ‘You don’t need that.’

Lucy didn’t know what to say. He may as well have denied that the sun had to go on rising every morning. ‘Yes, I do. I came with you for a reason, because we share a whole lot of things. And I don’t just mean New Vegas and knowing my dad.’

‘Do we, vaultie,’ he muttered bitterly. ‘Like what?’

‘You know what.’ Her cheeks were turning hot, but she blurted out, ‘Attraction. I’m attracted to you. We’re not just existing when we’re together. We’re living. Sure, I haven’t known many people in my life, but I’ve known enough to tell that you’re different.’

He laughed softly. ‘Different. Well, I’m pleased for you that you feel alive when you’re wandering around with a corpse. I’m a wreck. I barely survived the last time, and I’m not talking about my body. Do you think I want to go through all that again? Do you think that will give my life meaning? ’

Loving someone. Trusting someone.

‘Yes,’ she insisted, even though she didn’t know the specifics of what he was talking about. All that must be a woman connected to Vault-tec. A woman Cooper was in love with. ‘I think you need it, and we can do anything together.’

Cooper went on glaring at the ground.

In a softer tone, Lucy said, ‘Please talk to me. If you need answers, we’ll get you answers, but right now I don’t even know what the questions are.’

She wanted to know everything, Cooper realized. He could unburden his devastated heart to Lucy, and she wouldn’t turn away from him. She’d hold his heart so carefully his hands, and he’d fall hard for her, because he wouldn’t be able to help himself.

But what then.

What fucking then.

This world would kill him, or her, and then one of them would experience unimaginable pain, the kind that was hell on earth, worse even than having his humanity blasted out of him by nuclear fucking radiation.

This world was already too cruel. They would be stupid to invite even more pain.

So, what now?

Cooper already knew what now. He was practicing the words as he took his next breath. It had been a long time since he’d been on screen, but a man didn’t forget his life’s work.

‘That’s real sweet, darlin’, but you’re looking for something deeper than what I feel. I’ve misled you and for that I’m real sorry.’ For a second he forced a cocky grin. ‘Not that I ain’t flattered and happy for a warm bed at night.’

Lucy’s face slackened with shock. Cooper turned and walked on before she realized that his grin was a lie, or he flung himself at her feet, took it all back, and begged for her forgiveness.

***

They passed through a settlement mid-afternoon the following day. Not a word was spoken between them as Cooper paid in caps to fill up their water canteens. Lucy hated seeing him pass over the payment for her. She felt like a transaction, and she’d wanted to feel like his friend. His partner. In all the appealing senses of that word.

Of course, there was Max. She hadn’t forgotten about Max, but with every step they’d taken on this journey, her thoughts of him turned lukewarm. He was…comfortable. They could be comfortable together in a vault. He wouldn’t teach her to kill radscorpions, or make her heart flutter when he smiled at her, or stab a man through the hand when he realized they were being double-crossed. He couldn’t kiss like Cooper either.

Something had happened between You nearly made my heart quit beating when you touched my shoulders and when they woke up, but Lucy didn’t know what it was. She’d gone to sleep cherishing Cooper and feeling herself falling for him, but Cooper had woken up and decided on the opposite.

He thought he was a wreck. Ruined. All she saw was a man with alluring amounts of grit and determination, a roguish attitude that was too sexy to be allowed, and a heart that wanted to give love to someone. He needed to give it probably even more than he wanted to receive it.

Cooper finished pouring a stream of water for Dogmeat so she could lap it up. He fondled the dog’s ears, murmuring, ‘Who’s a good girl?’

Lucy was not going to feel envious of the dog. That was too humiliating.

When Cooper glanced up, his eyes locked on something on the far side of the dwellings.

‘Shit,’ he muttered under his breath. ‘Vaultie, turn around and walk back the way we came. Slowly. I’m behind you.’

But it was too late. Lucy’s mouth fell open as she saw a Knight of the Brotherhood of Steel scan the area, focus on her, and approach with heavy, armoured footsteps, machine gun in both hands and ready to aim right at her.

A Knight. What did they want with her? Maybe they wanted to question her about Moldovar. Maybe her father had enlisted their help in tracking her down.

Cooper stepped in front of her and growled out of the corner of his mouth, ‘Get out of here. Go.’ His hand was on his pistol, ready to draw and shoot.

Before Lucy could move, the Knight flipped up his eye piece and visor, and she saw a familiar face.

‘Lucy!’ Max grinned happily down at her and waved a cheery armoured hand.

All the fear left her body, and she went limp. In front of her, Cooper showed no sign of relaxing. His hand still gripped his gun.

Lucy gave her friend a puzzled smile, and stepped around Cooper before Max could notice his threatening stance. The two men had never met properly, and during their first encounter, they’d nearly killed each other. ‘Max, what are you doing here?’

‘I thought you might come this way. I was looking for you. Not as a Knight—just as me,’ Max added quickly, and then he beamed at her. ‘I’ve come to escort you to New Vegas.’

It was clear that Max expected words of gratitude for such a statement, but Lucy could only stare at him, dumbfounded.

Cooper let go of his gun and stuck his thumbs in his belt. ‘Vaultie don’t need you, Maxwell. She’s got me.’

‘It’s Maximus.’

‘Deserters live short, painful lives in the Brotherhood, so just fly away home, birdie.’ Cooper made a fluttering motion with his fingers.

‘They won’t notice I’m gone for a while,’ Max said blithely. ‘I’m on a patrol mission, so I’ll just patrol in the direction you’re going, Lucy.’

‘Goddamn idiot,’ Cooper muttered under his breath.

‘Well, if you’re sure,’ Lucy said doubtfully, but she thought Cooper was probably right. The Brotherhood didn’t seem like an easy-going bunch.

‘You…you don’t want me to come with you?’ Max asked, looking like a puppy who was about to be kicked.

‘Of course I do,’ she quickly assured him, while a hard, sarcastic voice in the back of her mind said, No, I don’t .

Max brightened immediately. ‘Great! Then let’s go. This way, right?’ Max pointed over his shoulder toward the east.

She dared a look at Cooper’s face. His jaw was flexing as he glared at Max.

Cooper spoke under his breath. ‘If you go with him, you’ll be caught in the crossfire when the Brotherhood arrests him.’

‘I’ll persuade him to go home before nightfall,’ Lucy whispered. ‘Max can be impulsive, but he always does the right thing in the end.’

Max had stolen the fusion cell from Vault 4 to power his suit, which would have meant all the vault dwellers would die, but when she told him to put it back, he did.

‘Who’s end, his or yours?’ Cooper asked.

Lucy winced. She didn’t want to ask Cooper for anything after being given the silent treatment by him for over a day, but when Max went back to the Brotherhood, she wanted Cooper with her for the rest of the journey to New Vegas. ‘It’s just a few hours, and then you and I will be able to continue as normal. Okay?’

Cooper watched her in angry silence.

‘Or don’t come. It’s up to you.’

Lucy didn’t wait for an answer, she just set off at Max’s side and hoped Cooper would follow.

After a few moments she glanced back to check where he was. He was just standing there, glaring at her, but after a moment he gave a shake of his head and followed.

Lucy gave a tiny sigh of relief.

‘The Brotherhood has interesting ways of punishing deserters,’ Cooper said conversationally, speaking up behind them. ‘Ever seen someone crucified, son? I saw a whole line of Knights and squires hammered onto crosses, oh, about forty years back. All dead. No idea what they’d done. The interesting thing about being crucified, it’s not the blood loss or injuries that kill you. With your arms stretched out like that your lungs don’t work and you suffocate. Drownin’ on dry land.’

Lucy whipped her head around and mouthed at him, What is wrong with you?

Cooper gave her a hard smile, sauntering along like was having a great day.

At her side, Max gazed straight ahead like he hadn’t heard anything, but his happy expression had vanished.

A few hours later, it was nearing dark, and Lucy hadn’t been able to persuade Max to go back to the Brotherhood. Cooper had listened to her arguments and persuasion with growing irritation.

What if I just blow his head off? That would be a helluva satisfying end to this aggravating day.

A heavy whomp-whomp noise reached his ears, coming from the northwest, quiet but steadily growing louder. Against the brilliant orange sunset, Cooper spotted a swollen-bellied Vertibird. He’d seen thousands of these transport helicopters in the sky during in his days in the army. It wasn’t close enough yet for him to see the markings, but they would be Brotherhood insignia. Unless he and Lucy got out of there, they would both be dead before the sun dipped over the horizon.

‘That’s the Brotherhood. Vaultie, we need to move. Now.’

To Cooper’s relief, Lucy didn’t hesitate or argue, but before she could run to him, Max reached out and seized her by the arm.

‘Lucy, you can’t go. The ghoul can do what he likes.’

Like hell he was leaving without Lucy.

‘You’re going to get her killed, you hunk of junk.’ Cooper pulled out his gun and pointed it at Max.

Lucy pulled against the armoured suit’s grip. ‘Max, let go of me. I need to go.’

Dogmeat was growling and snapping at Max.

‘You can’t go to New Vegas. It’s not safe. You have to come with me.’

Lucy looked up at Max with huge eyes, and then at the fast approaching Vertibird. ‘Max, what did you do?’

‘The Brotherhood are offering you a safe place.’

‘The Brotherhood don’t give a shit about anyone’s safety,’ Cooper seethed. ‘Lucy’s valuable because her daddy wants her back, and they’ve figured that out.’

Max clenched his jaw and shook his head, but his eyes were full of anxiety. 'That's not true. They promised me she could stay with me.'

'They're using you, numbskull,' Cooper seethed. 'The Brotherhood doesn't give a shit about your feelings. They'll take her from you the second she enters your camp.'

The Vertibird was close enough for them to see the pilot, and it started its descent. Cooper swore loudly.

Lucy pulled out of Max’s grip and ran to him. ‘Come on. We have to run.’

‘Ain’t nowhere to run, sweetheart. We’ve got no cover.’ He turned to Max. ‘You selfish prick. Look what you've done.’

‘I'm not selfish. I’m the good guy, and you’re the bad guy.’

Cooper flicked his eyes up and down the Knight armour. ‘Is that so? What have you done that’s so good?’

Max angrily jabbed his thumb at his chest. ‘I protected Lucy from you back in Filly.’

‘Well, I guess that’s case closed,’ Cooper sneered. ‘But answer me one question, just for the hell of it. If you’re so keen to protect Lucy, why not kill me and run away with her? Because then you’d have to give up the suit?’

Lucy cast a glance over Max’s suit of armour. He sure did love that armour. He needed it, like Cooper needed his inhaler. Lucy wondered if he’d ever be able to live without it.

But he put the fusion core back , she thought desperately. He put it back.

‘I can see you’re struggling with something there, vaultie, but save it for when you’re tossing and turning on your bedroll. Get behind me.’

Lucy stepped behind Cooper, pressing herself close to him. Max wouldn’t hurt her, but she didn’t trust the Brotherhood and didn’t want to go anywhere with them.

Max scowled. ‘She’s not going staying with you, ghoul.’

‘That’s the lady’s decision, and she doesn’t seem to want to go with the tin cans, so I guess I’m shooting our way out of here. How about I start with you?’

Cooper raised his gun and pointed it at Max’s head. The boy immediately flipped his visor down and aimed his energy weapon at Cooper.

Behind him, he could feel Lucy pressed tight against his back, her fingers gripping his bicep in fear.

The two men were still pointing their guns at each other when two Knights and a squire approached them.

‘Stand down, ghoul.’

‘Shove it up your shiny metal asses?’ Cooper drawled.

The Knights raised their guns and pointed them at Cooper. This wasn’t going to work. If Lucy didn’t do something, Cooper was going to die.

‘Wait,’ Lucy yelped, and stepped out from behind him.

‘Lucy, no,’ Cooper said sharply.

She’d seen Cooper take bullets without any ill effects, but even he wouldn’t survive having his head blown off. She addressed the newcomers. ‘I’ll go with you, but please don’t hurt Cooper.’

This wasn’t what Cooper wanted. His teeth were grit tight as he watched Lucy approach Max, getting further and further away from him.

‘Okay? Just don’t hurt Cooper.’

One of the Knights nodded sharply.

‘Cooper, put your gun down, please,’ she implored him.

‘Disarm him, squire. We will shoot to kill if you don’t comply, ghoul,’ the Knight warned him.

If it was just him, Cooper would take his chances, but with bullets flying everywhere, Lucy might get hit. As long as she was alive, he could get her back. Even from these tin can assholes.

The squire stripped Cooper of his gun, his shotgun, and his knife, and took them back to the Vertibird. One of the Knights grabbed Lucy by the wrist and she yelped in pain.

‘Get your hands off her,’ Cooper growled.

Max approached Cooper, and with the suit modulating his voice, he demanded, ‘Give me your medication.’

‘The fuck I will.’ The coward couldn’t even lift his visor and look him in the eyes. When Cooper didn’t move, Max seized the saddle bag from his shoulder and flipped it open.

‘Max, no!’ Lucy gasped, pulling against the Knight.

Without those drugs, Cooper would suffer, and then he’d turn into what her mom became, a mindless feral ghoul. He’d lose everything that made him Cooper. Lucy screamed as she struggled in the Knights grip. ‘No! Leave him alone! Don’t touch his things, Max. You said you wouldn’t hurt him. Just let him go and I’ll come with you.’

Max emptied the contents of the saddle bags on the ground and crushed the little glass vials beneath his metal boot.

‘Max, no,’ Lucy screamed.

Cooper stared hard at Max, his insides cold with rage. ‘Sure is helpful knowing what the good guy looks like.’

Max turned and clanked away.

Fuck , thought Cooper. He was in the middle of nowhere with no meds and no weapons. He was so fucked. So was Lucy, because if he couldn't get to her, she'd be handed right over the Vault-Tec.

Lucy was crying now, weakly struggling in the Knight’s grip, but her movements were less energetic now. More hopeless.

She looked at Cooper, tears trailing down her cheeks. ‘Did you mean what you said? That you don’t feel anything? That you misled me?’

There wasn’t any point in admitting that he’d been untruthful now. He couldn’t have her. He couldn’t hold her. She was going to be taken from him, and he would turn feral and die. It was best that Lucy remembered him as a cruel, heartless bastard so that she forgot about him quickly.

Only looking at the devastation on her face, Cooper realized that Lucy was going break her heart over him, and he over her, no matter what.

Cooper gazed into her big, soulful eyes, and shook his head. ‘Not a word of it, darlin’. Not one word.’

I read an essay about why Max might be an antagonist in S2 and it helped me to write this chapter. I was going to put Max forcing Lucy to go with him down to ‘a misguided sense of what is right because Max always does what’s right, even if he is a dum-dum sometimes.’ But does he care about what’s right? I'm not so sure anymore. His traumatic childhood, cult brainwashing, and strong sense of ego/heroism make him vulnerable to the Brotherhood’s dangerous goals. He’s never thinking that hard about what’s right until someone who’s actually a good person knocks the popcorn out of his hands and tells him to put the fusion core back.

Thank you for reading! Chapter Five is here.

#ghoulcy #vaultghoul #cooper howard #the ghoul #lucy maclean #fallout fanfiction #fanfic

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slytherinshua · 8 months ago

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CRASH A DATE, GET A BOYFRIEND

genre. fluff. friends to lovers. university au ig. warnings. jealousy. overthinking and crying. kissing. not rly proofread. pairing. sangyeop x fem!reader. wc. 2.4k. request. no. a/n. my love choi sangyeop :( even tho no one will read this lmao i have to write for my beloved lucy and sangyeop is soooo college boyfriend coded omg i love him sm

For years, you had never felt any tension or uncomfort in the company of Sangyeop. You spent hours of every day talking with him. You were best friends— practically inseparable. But things seemed to shift in the last year, and you didn’t like it.

He was still your best friend, and you still spent every day with him, but a glaringly obvious change had occurred, and you weren’t sure how things would ever be the same between you two.

You had grown feelings for him.

It was a textbook example of how to lose a long friendship. You should have trusted your best friend in high school when she warned you that guys and girls could never stay just friends. It was wonderful for 4 years, and you cherished all the memories you had made with Sangyeop in that time. But now, the feelings you held for him had changed your attitude.

It was hard for you to spend too long in his company without getting incredibly awkward and hot in the face. Really, it was his fault for being so attractive. The worst feeling, though, was the constriction in your chest whenever you saw him with other girls.

Feeling jealous over your best friend was laughable, but you just couldn’t stand it. He had always had other friends— and other female friends, at that. You had even lived through seeing him in a semi-serious relationship and had absolutely no problem. You were happy for Sangyeop when he got a girlfriend in the first year of university. But now, you wanted to fight off every girl who even glanced in his direction.

He wasn’t yours, but at the same time, he was. You had known him the longest. You were the closest friend he had. Everything would be perfect if only you didn’t long for more.

It was inevitable for everything to erupt in a sudden and unpredictable explosion the longer you stuffed down your feelings. You had just never expected it to happen like this.

“Why would you do that, Y/n? You’ve never acted like this before. Ever.” Sangyeop’s words felt like they were stabbing you repeatedly. He didn’t exactly sound angry— more extremely confused and maybe slightly annoyed. You didn’t blame him. If you had a little more sense, you would have known better than to crash his blind date. It was definitely overstepping boundaries.

“I- I don’t know! I’m sorry, okay?” You pleaded. You weren’t brave enough to meet his eyes. The feeling of having upset him or ruined something for him was awful.

“Why would you do it, though? I wouldn’t have gone on all these blind dates if you weren’t so insistent that I got another girlfriend. I told you I was fine to stay single after Hayoung— but I thought you wanted me to find someone.” He asked, exasperated. It didn’t help that it was already past dark, both of you standing under the narrow overhead outside of a restaurant to try to shield away from the rain. It still drenched your left shoulder, though.

“Well, I just don’t anymore!” You shouted back, just as overwhelmed and confused as Sangyeop was in this situation. The way you had glared at the girl and told her to leave was so uncharacteristic of you that even you had been shocked. Sangyeop didn’t seem to take your attempt to end the conversation as a valid answer, and he pressed on for your reason why.

“Just tell me. You had to have had a reason. You would never do that randomly. What? Did she have a bad record or something? What could it have possibly-“

“It’s because I like you! And you’ve never seemed to notice, but I couldn’t ever say it out loud because you’re too important to me to lose! And- and I was afraid and scared and confused, and I just don’t know why it had to happen, but-“ Sangyeop stopped your panicked rambling before you could finish— not that it was making any sense to either of you, anyway.

“Y/n, stop.” He croaked out a bit softer, grabbing your wrist to pull you under the overhang and out of the rain. You barely noticed that you had gotten more exposed to the downpour. You couldn’t differentiate the rain on your cheeks from your tears that were streaming down. Unfortunately, Sangyeop could.

He let out a small sigh and his lips pulled up into a sad smile before dropping again, “You’re so…”

“Stupid? Yeah, I know.” You laughed through your tears, trying to not look quite as pathetic in front of the man you had loved for years now.

“That’s not what I was going to say.” He defended, his eyes still searching your face for any sign of understanding.

You still couldn’t tell whether he was angry at you or just confused. You had completely blocked out any possibility that this situation could turn out for the better. You didn’t deserve a wonderful outcome from this. You were the one who messed everything up in the first place. You couldn’t feel entitled to anything anymore; especially not Sangyeop’s affection. You wouldn’t even blame him if he stopped being friends with you over this. Crashing his date and then confessing to him out of the blue? It was definitely not what best friends did… more like crazy ex’s.

“You’re so… clueless.” Sangyeop repeated, finishing the statement this time with a laugh. You looked up at his face, finally brave enough to meet his eyes. The last thing you had expected was to smile on his face after what you had done. You were sure you looked a mess right now— with mascara running down your cheeks and your clothes all wet and wrinkled, but Sangyeop’s eyes held some warmth that you hadn’t seen for days, and it was comforting.

“What now?” You asked in a whisper. The weight on your chest was still there, and you couldn’t begin to think of what Sangyeop meant by that response. Your brain was a mess, and all you wanted to do was just sink to the floor and disappear forever.

“For now… let’s go home.” Sangyeop said softly. Although you felt uneasy about the idea of leaving things unresolved, going home was probably the smartest decision; so you nodded and let him pull your hand to lead you to the edge of the street where he hailed a cab. The ride back to your dorm was quiet. You mostly focused on the rain sliding down your window, pretending as if Sangyeop wasn’t sitting next to you. You said goodnight briefly to Sangyeop when you got back home before retreating into your room. You showered as quickly as possible and got in bed. You tried your best to sleep, but the thoughts racing in your head kept you awake almost all night. You were screwed for tomorrow’s lecture.

“Did you drink?! You look awful.” Wonsang frowned as soon as you walked into your morning lecture and dropped your bag next to your chair.

“No. I don’t drink.” You muttered, plopping down into the seat and immediately resting your head on the desk.

“...Was it Sangyeop?” Wonsang queried, making you open your eyes and turn to glare at him.

Wonsang, along with Yechan and Gwangil, were Sangyeop’s closest friends after you. You didn’t spend too much time with Yechan or Gwangil since you didn’t have any shared classes, but Wonsang was much closer to you. He had known about your crush on Sangyeop for a while now. He was sworn to secrecy as soon as you knew that he knew, and you trusted him not to spill anything.

You groaned and closed your eyes again, your voice muffled by the desk, “I’m the dumbest person on the planet, Wonsang.”

“True.”

You gave him another glare, “I crashed his blind date.”

“You- what?” You could only nod along to Wonsang’s shock.

“I crashed it, scared off the girl, and then confessed to him… like an idiot.” You felt like crying all over again.

“What did he say?” Wonsang asked curiously.

“He didn’t! He didn’t say anything. I don’t know what to do— I feel like such a fucking idiot, Wonsang. He probably hates me forever. I’m so stupid for telling him how I feel.” You knocked your head against the desk repeatedly, drowning in your misery until you heard Wonsang scoff.

“You’re not stupid for confessing to him, but you are for jumping to conclusions before you hear his answer.” Wonsang said simply, but you could barely process the words that came out of his mouth. The thought of even seeing Sangyeop at the dorm later made your stomach twist.

But you would have to face him eventually— it was unavoidable. And the time came right after 5 pm.

You walked back into your dorm, trying to be as quiet as a mouse. You were barely even breathing as you tried to take your shoes off and get to your room before you had to come into contact with Sangyeop. Unfortunately for you and your plan, he was waiting for you in the living room.

“Y/n, we need to talk.”

You sucked in a breath and cursed yourself mentally. What were you even going to say to him? What was he going to say to you?

You shuffled to the living room where Sangyeop had stood up from his spot on the couch. He took one step forward and you subsequently took one step back. You had never been more scared than right now. You weren’t scared of Sangyeop; you didn’t think that was even possible. But you were scared of the situation, and even more scared of the outcome. The possibility of rejection was scary, but the possibility of losing Sangyeop was even more painful. You couldn’t imagine your life without him.

“Are you going to leave? Am I going to lose you?” You let your biggest fears spill out of your mouth before Sangyeop could get a word in. You didn’t like the seriousness of his expression; it was too unlike him.

His face morphed into one of astonishment, “Why would you think that? I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here… and I’m staying.” He said firmly, as if he knew you needed extra reassurance. You nodded slowly, hearing his words and letting them ease the nerves in the pit of your stomach and slow the racing of your heart. Sangyeop led you to sit down on the couch next to him, and you braced your heart for whatever you would hear.

“I just thought… you would hate me after last night.” You confessed meekly.

“First of all, I could never hate you. And about what you did last night… I was kind of waiting for it to happen.” He said slowly.

Your eyes widened, “W-what do you mean? You’re not mad at me for crashing your date? But what about the girl— I thought you said she was cute.” You spluttered, confused.

Sangyeop just shook his head a little amused, “You really don’t know, do you? Yeah, she was pretty, but nowhere near as pretty as you are. I’ve liked you for… what… 3 years now? Maybe longer?” Sangyeop’s eyes drifted up to the ceiling as he thought, meanwhile you could only open your mouth slightly in shock.

“What about Hayoung— You were still dating her 2 years ago.” You pressed. It was hard to ignore the sudden warmth you felt in your chest, but you forced yourself to not get too excited just yet. There were still too many unanswered questions.

“Honestly? Dating Hayoung was me trying desperately to get my mind off of you. It was stupid, I know, but it worked for a while. Until Hayoung realized I was pining for you the entire time.” He laughed, and you suddenly couldn’t get enough of the sound. “But she didn’t get mad at me for it… She said she knew all along, and she tried to get me to confess to you. I couldn’t do it, though. I was too scared. So I tried to forget about my feelings for you and date someone else again… hence all the blind dates. When you started setting up new ones for me after they failed, I kind of accepted that I didn’t have a chance with you anymore.”

You breathed out slowly, your heart beating rapidly in your chest. It was almost hard to contain just how much you adored the man who stood before you. You wanted to melt into his arms and kiss his face and tell him again and again how much you loved him. But you waited for him to finish talking first.

“I know you. I knew that if you liked me, you wouldn’t let me date another girl without rejecting you first. And I was right.” He smiled, a hint of fondness in his eyes. “Although, I never expected you to be so bold about it.” He added as an afterthought with a laugh. Your cheeks flared in embarrassment. The decision you made last night had been rather rash.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve thought that one through.” You mumbled out.

“Don’t be.” Sangyeop breathed, “If anything, I think it made me fall for you even more.” You glanced at his eyes, taken aback with how much warmth and love and assurance filled them.

“Are you sure you really like me?” You asked quietly, aware of how you and Sangyeop were both subtly shifting closer to each other on the sofa. His face was mere inches from yours at this point, and his eyes bore into yours, neither of you able to look away from the other.

“Yes. I like you— I love you. I’ve loved you for 3 years.” He said sincerely, and that was all you needed to hear to get the confidence to pull him closer. His lips colliding with yours felt like the most perfect thing in the world. You fit together like puzzle pieces— like you were always meant to be.

He kissed you like he had been waiting his entire lifetime to do it, like this was his only chance to. And you never wanted it to end— the softness of his lips moving against yours, or his hands in your hair pulling you slightly closer, or the smell of his cologne and the taste of his lips invading your senses. You would have them all last for a million years if you could.

Everything felt right at last; it was perfection. He was perfection.

↳ lucy taglist: @eternalgyu,, @evalevaeva,, @weird-bookworm,, @seunghancore,, @kangtaehyunzzz

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sa1808fi · 2 days ago

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I have a soft spot for aus where Emmet is found before he gets out of Undar and goes on his whole villain arc.

But I do think that the way he reacts after being rescued will heavily depend on when during those 5 years he ends up being found.

Around 1 year, he's probably going to bounce back pretty quickly. Sure it still hurts to think about how long he was in Undar, and all the things he saw, but his friends still found him! They didn't abandon him! He just won't think about any of the horrifying discoveries he made there.

Year 2 is similar to 1, it's just that now, the knowledge of the world of the man upstairs will weigh more heavily on him.

So along with the longer sad and depressive episodes he has, he's also going to be spilling a lot of out-of-pocket facts about the real world that'll confuse everyone around him.

Year 3 is when he's starting to lose hope at being found, so when his doubts at being found are destroyed, he's going to start off ecstatic. Emmet is going to run around Syspocalypstar as soon as he can, trying to absorb all of the new information with the same enthusiasm the 'old' Emmet would have.

And then a week later all of his trauma from Undar is going to hit him out of nowhere, and because he's scared Lucy and the others will leave him because now he's 'damaged', Emmet is going to try and push all of it down.

Of course that doesn't end well, and then he just ends up spending a lot of the time quiet and miserable, fearing that one wrong move will leave him abandoned and isolated again.

Year 4- oh ho- yeah this is where the rage at how his friends treated him starts. He's had 4 years now to look back on his life, so all of the mistreatment is going to stand out very clearly.

Being saved after 4 years is going to feel like a dream to Emmet, so he will spend around a week to so getting used to just existing out of Undar.

Once he fully processes that the people who treated him like he was replaceable actually did come back for him,he's going to avoid the heck out of all of them.

The memories of how easily they seemed to move on with their lives is still fresh in his mind, so coming back to reality and seeing how easily they expect him to go back to 'normal' is... infuriating to say the least.

And then we have Year 5. Where he is a mix of angry and sad, and constantly about to have a meltdown of some kind. I think even after being saved, this is when he's going to resemble Rex the closest.

Emmet has now had 5 years to stew in all of the knowledge of how his world really works, and 2 years to let that anger take root. No one's gonna have a good time.

He's going to spend a lot of time just staring at everyone, more or less sizing them up and trying to figure out why it took 5 years to find him. Any attempts to make him feel better is just met with blank stares or calculating gazes.

Emmet is not used to all of the comfort his friends are giving him, he was the one that would provide the comfort, but having them do it feels wrong. So what does he do? He blocks them out and spends time by himself, trying to gain his footing after all that has happened.

Though- regardless of when he is saved, the boy is going to have so. much. trauma.

It's the later years where he clashes with his friend the most, because that's when the betrayal and results of his isolation really hit him like a train.

On one hand, you have a man who's been put through hell and back, and is expected to act the same way he was before his whole worldview crumbled.

On the other hand, you have a group of friends who really want their friend back and want to treat him better than they used to, because they had to experience life with him gone and found it awful.

It's not a good combonation.

#emmet brickowski #rex dangervest #<- he's kinda there?#the lego movie #the lego movie 2 #lego movie #lego movie 2 #if you saw this post when it was a reblog #no you didn't #anyways-#Any kind of trauma Emmet has intensifies the longer he spends in Undar #Remember that #Also I haven't even touched on the physical implications of what staying in undar would result in #the longer he's there the worse his hearing gets #any injuries he has have a increased chance of scarring the longer it takes for him to be found #Being able to move after laying paralyzed for so long is also going to be hard #year 1-2 is when Emmet is glad to have other's help him #year 3 is when he's more hesitant to show weakness #year 4-5 is when he feels that he needs to handle it himself #because if he doesn't let them get close then they can't hurt him anymore #right?#so yeah #have this #saffi rambles

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supernovasilence · 9 months ago

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I'M GONNA CRY I JUST SPENT LIKE AN HOUR ON AN ASK AND TRIED TO SAVE IT AS A DRAFT LIKE A FOOL AND NOW IT'S GONE. It was anonymous too I can't even @ the asker ciar I hope you see this ToT

anyway the ask was "please talk more about 'their siblings are all the Pevensies have' " so I'll try to reconstruct what I had

Listen if there's anything I like in fiction it's siblings, and relationships that would probably be unhealthily codependant in real life but this is fiction so it's fine (or you push them that little bit farther into unhealthy and then you have a dark/tragic au, which can be fun too). So thinking about the Pevensies makes me go feral a bit.

Narnia, and her thrones, are a gift, and they're a burden.

The Pevensies gave up their home, their friends, their family, their old lives—even the memory of their old lives—to rule Narnia. And their old lives currently included being sent away into the country to shelter from a war, so they would have lost some of that anyway, and I'm certainly not saying finding Narnia was a bad thing. But it came with sacrifices, and out of all the things they lost, they still have each other. In all the magical, beautiful, wonderful, but strange things they have to learn, their siblings are familiar. Faced with sudden, terrifying responsibility, they can still be just kids, just Pete and Su and Ed and Lu, with each other. And then part of that responsibility is Peter and Susan being parents to Edmund and Lucy as well as siblings, and it's strange and it's familiar and everything gets complicated and messy but it all boils down to they love each other so much.

They're the only humans around. They're the only ones confused by the magical, medieval land they're in. Their friends and advisors do what they can, of course, but in the end the weight of running a country all comes down on four tiny pairs of shoulders; they're the only ones who know how that feels. They make friends, and friends that become like family, but in those early days the only people they've known more than a few days are their siblings. And they've known each other forever. They're the ones that know how to make Peter laugh when he works too hard or coax Susan into cruelly needed bravery and she's terrified or see past Edmund's angry outbursts to what's really bothering him or convince Lucy to be more responsible without telling her she's wrong for being young or emotional or wild. They know the in jokes, the favorite colors, the secret petty hates (Lucy doesn't like bugs, if you make Peter wear gray he won't be able to focus all day because all he can think about is how much he hates wearing gray), the little tricks to cheer each other up. They know how to soothe each other out of nightmares and the sort of places they hide when they want to cry.

And they're the only ones who understand how they can have the magical joy that is their new life and still be sad. They're the only ones who remember England, everything and everyone they knew there. Later, when Narnia has soothed their homesickness with cruel mercy, they're the only ones who know what it is to miss what you can no longer remember, who understand the ache that still gets into your gets into your dreams some nights, long after you know the words and the names to explain.

And then they go back.

Once again, they lose home; once again, their siblings are all they keep. Digory went to Narnia, but he knew her for a few days in her infancy. He doesn't know her castles, hasn't learned her dances, hasn't ridden for leagues through her forests or sailed her seas. He doesn't know what it's like to lose years of your life in an instant. He still remembers the names of months and how to use common household items. He wanted to come back, so he could embrace his mother and make her well. The Pevensies were thrown out without warning, and their mother is far away under bomb-filled skies. But they still have each other. Peter still tries to lead, stumbling, scared, and the others try to support him; Edmund struggles; Lucy runs wild; Susan is frightened. It's strange and it's familiar.

They return to Narnia; it's broken, changed, a thousand years too old. Of everyone the Pevensies knew in the Golden Age, their siblings are all they have left. No one else understands how strange it all is, so much the same but so different, how it feels to be a legend.

Alright this got much longer than I planned and there are two diverging rambles from here so. I'm gonna start with my thoughts on the Pevensies' dynamic in my preferred and-then-they-get-to-keep-Narnia-somehow headcanon, and below the read more will be my thoughts about canon.

They're allowed to stay this time, and rule alongside Caspian. All Narnia has assumed, of course, that the kings and queens of old would. Only the Pevensies know the relief the others feel. Only they understand the secret mistrust they feel, too, that Aslan's promise will be a lie. Some Narnians have utter faith in him, and would think such doubt inconceivable (especially from the four he fought alongside, and died for), or even blasphemous. Some would have preferred if Jadis came back, or are wary of authority altogether after so long under the Telmarines, but Aslan is a story to them, not seen for centuries. He was the Pevensies' friend. Their doubt is mingled with the taste of betrayal, and shame for feeling so.

The Pevensies rebuild Narnia once more, not from ice this time but iron chains. The work is familiar and it isn't; Narnia is the same and it isn't. All Narnia cheers when Cair Paravel is rebuilt, but the Pevensies are the only ones left alive who called it home.

If this is an au where the Pevensies simply never go back after PC, then they are once again the only ones who remember England, and the people they left behind. They aren't surprised when someone says "I'm homesick" while standing in their bedroom in Cair Paravel, know who their siblings are talking about when they ask "do you think they're doing okay? we'll be dead before they even know we're missing", understand how they can be living such a joyous life and still carry a little ember of sorrow in them all the time. If this is an au where the Pevensies still travel between the worlds, but with more time spent in Narnia and a guarantee to always return there, then they are the only ones who know how confusing that is, living two lives, and how hard it is, lying to your family about so much that's so important to you.

But their siblings are family too, and always there no matter the world, and as long as they have each other, the Pevensies can survive anything. Susan is famous for her beauty, and they all four laugh the day she gets her first silver hair, the first among any of them.

"The dear little friends are going senile now," Trumpkin mutters, in his grumbly, affectionate way, and Susan just laughs and says,

"Oh, I quite plan to,"

because Peter is giving her hand a squeeze while Edmund and Lucy beam, and she knows they all understand what this means. They are growing and greying and living, here, in Narnia. They have been and they will. They never got old enough to go grey, the first time round. And they will get very grey indeed, and very old, and they will have lots of friends and a large extended family, and lots of people will have lots of pieces of them. But, though those things get fewer, there will still be some things that only their siblings understand best, because they knew each other first.

(Honestly my base headcanon is actually the Pevensies as a set morphing somewhere along the way into the Pevensies + Caspian as a set, but the point is these siblings spend years being the only ones being each other's closest people and it shows.)

Alright now the acknowledging-canon-for-once option!

They leave again. Peter and Susan know it's forever. Edmund and Lucy now know there is a forever away from Narnia, waiting for them someday. They think of the Professor, who still dreams about the world he saw for a few days as a child. How comforting his stories had seemed before! How sad they seem now, a lifetime spent missing what you will never have again! The Pevensies go to stiff, unhappy boarding schools, and are surrounded by people who don't understand everything they have lost, everything they will lose.

Perhaps cruelest of all, they begin then to be ripped away from their one constant: each other. The Pevensies return to the train platform where they were waiting to catch two different trains: one to the boys' school and one to the girls'. Peter and Susan can't talk through their complicated knot of loss and relief and confusion, can't console each other or offer answers to the question of "what now?". Edmund and Lucy can't share their own relief, their anxiety. Lucy can't cheer Peter up or ask him if losing Narnia can really be okay. Susan can't toss away Edmund's fears with calm logic when he's loses his temper at bullies and fears he's slipping back into old ways, or listen to him tell her she's still brave and beautiful and important and safe even though everyone treats her as a child (a girl-child, at that) and the newspapers speak of war.

The ties binding them fray a little more, and a little more, and a little more. The next summer, Peter goes to study with the Professor. Their parents take Susan to America. Edmund and Lucy are sent to their aunt and uncle. They come back with tales of months at sea, of their friends Caspian and Reepicheep and Aslan. They are all Peter and Susan will ever get of Narnia again. Peter and Susan are the only ones who understand the pain Edmund and Lucy are now feeling, knowing they're never going back, the ones who teach them how to breathe through it until breathing no longer hurts.

It's not enough. Fray and fray and fray. Thread by thread. Susan works hard to live in this world Aslan told her to live in. What right has she to do otherwise? The other three cling to a duty handed to them by prophecy when they were children. What right have they to ignore that? They grow up. Three of them go to university or get jobs and probably move out. (Lucy did not. I'm trying to keep this neutral and not rant-about-how-much-I-hate- canon but I won't ignore that Lucy was seventeen when she died.) They drift apart.

Digory forms the "friends of Narnia". Peter, Edmund, and Lucy are united again, bound together by their shared experiences as they have ever been. It's not the same, Susan is not there, but it's enough.

(Extra painful fun fact! When I typed "Peter, " my phone suggested "susan" as the next word! I have typed "Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy" so often even my phone expects them to be a set! This is fine!)

The Last Battle, the train crash. Peter, Edmund, and Lucy die. Susan buries them, and there is no one left to understand all she is mourning. Her last link to a home she cannot bear to acknowledge aloud. The children she played with. The adults she saw them grow into. She knows what Lucy would look like grown, either because she still remembers Narnia and won't admit it or subconsciously somewhere inside her, but Lucy will never be twenty-three this time around.

Peter, Edmund, and Lucy wait in "true" Narnia. Again, they dwell in magical splendour, and ache in their dreams. This time, they remember who they are missing. Still, they are surrounded by joy, and time does not seem very important anymore, so overall they are happy. (It's not the same, Susan is not there, but it's enough.) Susan lives and learns and mourns and makes her peace and comes to Narnia in her own time, the only one of them to grow old and the last to grow ageless. It's easy to forget sorrow, in that place; when Susan embraces her siblings, the only ones who understand how badly she has missed them are them, because they have missed her just the same. But now they are complete again, and that's all that matters.

#nova actually answers asks #the chronicles of narnia #pevensie siblings #peter pevensie #susan pevensie #edmund pevensie #lucy pevensie #the lion the witch and the wardrobe #prince caspian #the voyage of the dawn treader #the last battle #long post //#this got /so/ long i'm sorry #also halfway through it turned into an examination of the patterns of the pevensies' lives?#repeating and paralleling themselves and going back and forth and somehow forward or maybe sideways #lucy's dislike of bugs is canon #peter's dislike of wearing gray is not #capslock //

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kissorkill16 · 3 months ago

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Golden Warning: A Hello Neighbor Fanfic

By JJ

Summary: Nicky wakes up to his hands wrapped in golden chains.

The last thing Nicky did before he went to sleep, he took one of his pills in a glass of water.

He laid down on his bed, pulls his blanket over him, and fell backwards on his bed.

He felt his eyes close, and he was asleep.

He woke up somewhere surrounded by trees, and he immediately knew that he was in the woods of Raven Brooks. It was dark, and scary, like every other time he'd been here with his friends.

"How did I get here?", he asked himself. "Did I sleepwalk again?"

He looked around to see if anyone else was here with him, because at least he wouldn't be completely scared if someone was here with him...

But whatever was here with him probably wasn't human.

His eyes landed on two shadowy figures, figures of two little girls. Not just any little girls, Nicky recognized those two girls anywhere.

Lucy and Mya.

The two girls turned to see him, and Nicky immediately stepped backwards, getting ready to run. But they seemed to be faster than him, because he didn't even make it a foot away before he felt two hands grasp his arms. Nicky felt panic rise in his body, and he started struggling, trying to free himself from their hold.

"Let go of me!", he said. "I don't want to play with you! Stop making me play with you!"

But instead of scratching at him or getting angry like usual, they wrapped their arms around him, trapping him in a warm, tight, soft...hug.

Nicky stilled for a moment, then he hugged them back. Despite all of the things they put him through, despite them being a figment of his nightmares, he didn't care. He loved these two girls, no matter what they did to him, no matter what they said to him, he loved them. They were his friends after all.

They stayed like that for another moment, then the two girls pulled away, but didn't let go of Nicky's hands. They reached into their back pockets, and pulled out two golden charm bracelets, and wrapped them around the boy's hands.

Nicky was confused. He looked down at his hands, "W-What?", but before he could question further, Lucy and Mya were suddenly gone.

Nicky opened his eyes and sat up on his bed, he rubbed his tired eyes, and registered that there was something cold and metal on his face. He looked down at his hand, and saw the same golden charm bracelet he saw in his dream.

He looked at his other hand, and there was the other one too.

"But how?", he asked himself. He took off the bracelets, examining them more, then he suddenly felt cold. He looked up to see that his window was open.

But didn't he lock it before he went to bed? So how was it open?

He got up, walked to his window, and closed his window, locking it shut.

He turned back around to go back to bed, but then he noticed a folded piece of paper on his bedside drawer.

He walked to the drawer, picked up the note, unfolded it, and suddenly, he felt the hairs on his arms and legs stand on end, and his blood ran cold.

"I WARNED YOU, NICHOLAS."

#hello neighbor #welcome to raven brooks #nicky roth #lucy yi #mya peterson #my fics #hello neighbor fanfic #the guest

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wordsarelife · 1 year ago

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AFTERGLOW (possible ending 1)

pairing: Anthony Lockwood x reader

summary: just simply "meet me in the afterglow"

warnings: a bit of angst, but not too much, there's a happy ending!!

notes: tried doing a bit of a transition here, let me know if you got it or if it was way too confusing

-> back to part three

"y/n?" a tender voice called from across the room. you turned around to notice that the speaker had already come closer and was now standing right behind you.

"Anthony" you breathed. you hadn't seen him in a long time. not in real life at least. you had kept up with his work through the newspaper, collecting every article that mentioned him and strolling down portland row any time you were in England.

of course he was still living in his childhood home, even if his agency had become far more successful over the years and he was now owning the two houses right next to number 35.

"I haven't seen you in forever" he smiled and you both looked at each other longingly, but unsure how to greet the other

"it's good to see you" you said softly and even you noticed how his features grew even softer at the recognition of the patience in your voice, that had never left, even if you had been angry with him.

"I heard you that you left England a few years ago, so it's quite the surprise meeting you here"

"I did" you laughed "I went to Harvard, got my degree and originally wanted to stay there, but then the homesickness finally got the better of me"

a month before your wedding you and Henry had decided to end your engagement, it was a mutual decision. you had a long conversation with your parents and they finally accepted that you couldn't go through with what they had in mind for you. the contact had been low for a few years, your parents not being happy with your decisions at first, but as of now, you had been able to rekindle the relationship and they had even come to America to attend your graduation three years ago.

Today, Henry was married to a beautiful girl, a friend of yours that you had introduced to him. even if your somewhat romantic relationship had ended about seven years ago, you and Henry had stayed great friends. he was actually the reason you were here tonight, he wasn't able to make it to this art gala, so he had send you the ticket, keeping in mind how much you loved those.

"what are you up to these days?" you began to walk around mindlessly through the gallery

"a lot of ghost-hunting, still" he laughed "I've got the luxury now that I don't have to take every case, makes me get hurt a lot less."

"that's good to hear! how's George? and Lucy? still by your side, I hope"

"always" he smiled widely "they're still as unbearable and loyal as ever, they're gonna jump out of their socks, once I mention running into you"

"I definitely have to meet them again soon!"

"I mean, if you're finished walking around, you could accompany me home? I was actually planning on leaving before I saw you"

"oh sure, I mean if its alright with you"

"I wouldn't have suggested it if it wasn't"

"right" you laughed uncomfortably, before you followed him down the street and sat down in the cab beside him.

"the same old house" Anthony announced loudly, once the both of you had gotten out of the car

"not complaining, I love to see some familiarity, spending so much time away from home was weird" you both ignored how you had indirectly referred to his place as home, not that it was far off though. you followed him down the hallway, noticing that not much had changed over the years. and there, down in the kitchen were sitting George and Lucy, like they had been frozen in time.

"hello" you waved. Lucy's eyes shined bright in recognition and she quickly got off her chair to hug you, George directly behind her.

"what are you doing back home?" George asked

"yeah, I thought you would stay in America, I mean that's what Lockwood told us you went to-" she interrupted herself at the look that Lockwood was sending her

"that's right, but I finally decided to come back home" you smiled "I kept track off you as well"

"really?" both George and Lucy asked, but Lockwood drowned out both of them "you did?"

"yes, i've read every newspaper article and I saw a few interviews" you looked from one to the other "that's a really great reputation you've built over the years"

"I presume it's all thanks to you" Lockwood smiled and you raised your eyebrows, confused

after your father had retired and Matthew took over the business, you had asked him to keep an eye on the agency of your former boyfriend, invite them to every important event, where they could meet important people and give them the cases that the fittes agency was too busy to take.

"I wouldn't agree" you shook your head

"come on!" George whined "as if anyone had invited us to important meetings if you hadn't told your brother to"

"yeah" Lucy nodded "as if Matthew Fittes would've even known who we are if it wasn't for you"

you shook your head, laughing "I don't know what you're talking about"

later that evening, when George and Lucy had already gone up to their rooms, you sat in the library, still catching up with Lockwood, when it was eventually time to leave.

"it was great seeing you and Lucy and George as well" you smiled

"listen, y/n, what happened back then-"

"you don't have to say anything, Anthony" you said softly "I wasn't your responsibility to save me, alright? I respected your decision then and still do it now"

"maybe it should've been" he muttered and you shook your head

"living a life you didn't want to live? that doesn't seem fair to me"

"I think actually, I would've been a life I loved" he looked down in sadness "I just had to break what I loved the most"

"loved?" you breathed "you told me-"

"I lied, I just thought this whole thing would be better for you.. back then I was without means, I could barely keep the house, I didn't want to share a poor life with you"

"any life I would've shared with you would have been rich, no matter the circumstances" you paused "all I wanted was you, I would've never asked for more than just your love"

"you wanted to get married"

"my father wanted me to get married and I would've married you in a dumpster if that meant not loosing you, not loosing us"

"I really hurt you, y/n"

"you didn't just hurt me, Anthony. you ruined me for anybody else, I don't think that I've been able to love anyone since then, at least not in the way that I loved you. that's what keeps me up at night, every man I meet, has to win against you and that's just not possible"

"we were just children, y/n" he sighed "I saw it on your face back then, as your father announced the engagement and I knew that I was to blame for your pain, but there was nothing I could've given you, the way Henry could've given you things"

"do you see him here with me? Henry, I mean. do you see his ring on my finger?"

"no, but-"

"I mean you knew that we broke off our engagement, right? you must've heard.. somewhere, right?"

"yeah and-"

"why didn't you come find me then? I waited a year longer to start college, just in the hopes that you would come back"

"I thought you didn't want to see me"

"seeing you again was everything i've wanted Anthony" a tear slipped down your cheek

"I'm sorry" he said softly "maybe I could call you some time"

you laughed at his terrible attempt at making a joke "sure" you chuckled "but don't you dare lie to me again when I ask you if you love me"

"ask me right now" "what?"

"you heard me"

you took a breath "do- do you love me?"

"I do" Anthony breathed and you waited for the priests permission to kiss, before you leaned forward and pressed your lips onto your husbands.

the whole wedding party cheered and you could see Charlotte jump up from her seat at the front, running forward and hugging both your legs. Anthony took your daughter into his arms and you three shared a long hug

"mummy and daddy are finally married, chary" you laughed at her excitement as she squealed at your announcement

you let her down, so she could run back to your mum, while Anthony and you walked down the aisle together, smiling at all the people that had come to see you get married

"fucking finally" George muttered, which made not only Lucy but Matthew and Penelope laugh as well

the proposal had come two years after you had reconnected and shortly after you found out about Charlotte's existence, it had taken you quite some time to finally tie the knot. three years to be exact. Anthony was still leading Lockwood and co and you spent most of your time writing or plucking flowers from your garden. Anthony had surprised you with the little cottage right outside of London, in the countryside. he was still close enough to the agency, but out there in the green, you could raise your children and grow old together.

you had informed in of the irony quite promptly, hadn't he once told you that it was exactly the life, little house outside of the city where you would raise your children, he didn't want.

now everything was finally right. he had told you so himself. and every time you would find his eyes, you were glad that everything turned out how it did.

that evening you spent sitting on your chairs in front of the house, holding each others hands and silently watching the afterglow.

#anthony lockwood #lockwood and co #lucy carlyle #anthony lockwood x reader #george karim #netflix #ali hadji heshmati #cameron chapman #ghost hunting #ruby stokes #illicit affairs #taylor swift #illicitaffairsseries

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morningstarwrites · 7 months ago

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Omg oh my star i love receiving your updates notifications, and you keep doing such a lovely job to be consistent with it, thank u a lot for the food. So where do I start…this chapter might become one of my fav like ever. I love that now Rosie is gonna help Angel with his ‘project’ and please I need to see Lucy actually getting jealous of someone being near Al, or overall being protective of him, cause I can’t be the only one who think that’s hot as hell?! Eheh see what I did there! Totally pun intended

We already seen Al being jealous in numerous occasions, so I think it would be hilarious if Lucy, who actually has more grasp on his feelings for him, gets jealous and Al doesn’t understand why the king of hell is suddenly angry and clingy to him but he actually finds that he doesn’t mind it, and he gets even more confused lol

I adore how in this chapter Lucifer is respecting Al’s boundaries and Al is finally asking for another hug. I screamed so hard when he made Lucy sit on his lap, cause one hug wasn’t enough, and Lucifer just went on with it, following him like a little duckling. One of my favourite scene was definitely the ‘drunk fist fight’ scene. The mental image of Lucifer and Al wobbling like infant and throwing punches and strawberries at each other was priceless. At one point I was wheezing so hard I had to take a break. Ohhh and Lute finally made her move eheh Imagine if she just ends up sanding Nifty back, only after a day, cause she is discovering a new novelty: bad girls. Heaven is doomed!!!

I love this, can’t wait to read more💕💕

Btw I was wondering…u talked about showing more of their relationship in the future, when they finally get together. And do u accept prompt by any chance? Cause I am a big bottom!al stan and I would love to see Lucifer spoil the HELL out of Alastor, like giving him 🎁 and such, and him not knowing what to do with that:)

‘One the one hand, how dare he 'baby' me, on the other hand, hmmm, this is actually kind of nice’ kinda of thing😆

Honestly I mostly say that cause I am ace, and that would be what I would want from a possible romantic relationship. I like the idea to be spoiled a lot lol

But anyway thank u for listening💜

I am SO touched, thank you 🥹 I'm so glad you liked the chapter!

And me personally, I love the jealousy trope! I'll sprinkle it in for sure. I know, that hug was a long time coming haaaaaah I get shocked by my own slow pace sometimes

Don't worry - their relationship is gonna be super romantic, I guarantee it! Definitely gift-giving and such. But also they'll still be dumb and aggressive together haha. I've always approached them as a Partnership of Equals so you'll see how it unfolds!

Thanks for letting me know your thoughts, because it definitely helps me think about what people are interested in seeing/carve out the details for my next chapter!

#spoilers #radioapple #ask #ao3 fanfic

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ghostatas · 1 year ago

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Baghera :(((((

THOUGHTS ON LUCIE FROM OPQ

Sweetie, queen, she was trying so hard but the dice rolls were just not on her side. Made for great angst but still ;((

Lucie, at the beginning, quarrels with Amy, calling her a brat and spoiled because she stole her water. It was boiling and this little kid just runs in front of her and steals the last of the water, like what!!! Rude!

So, lucie starts complaining to Amy and her dad. But she's not being exactly rude? She's telling the dad that he needs to teach her daughter manners and to be respectful to their elders, something I think we were all taught as a child. Right now, Lucie doesn't care about Amy at all. She's just some random bratty kid that she'll never see again OK??? Why can't she be upset?

But it's not the last time they see eachother, not even close. They get trapped together, in a very dangerous, scary environment.

Lucie is a free-spirited character. She is smart and logical, but she is curious, she likes to adventure, experience and learn new things. It's probably how she met Diego; they are similar, twin flames in a way. Diego seems to be the more timid one of the duo, but will always support and follow lucie. Lucie is a leader; she knows her self worth, her importance and she knows she is smart.

She takes the lead in investigating during most of the tasks. When she sees Amy again, the situation is too chaotic to really process her being there, but she's not just going to leave her out to die so they all go in the control room together. They don't really interact much I think, but hey, they have a mutual dislike of Benito so that's cool! Amy also almost ends up saving them too by the end of the first episode, but ends up breaking down just before they are safe. Luckily everyone was fine, Jeffrey was pushing it a little but I swear he's probably a munchkin with his epic, mysterious backstory and his power of friendship (RiP wallace) ig. So yeah everyone is fine.

Amy is still crying by the time they return to Mikhail and get new clothes. I think this is the part when Lucie truly starts to care about Amy, or at least holds herself responsible for her. This is a lot for an adult to bear, let alone a little kid who still hasn't even processed her fathers DEATH, and who knows very little about their situation because no one has the time to explain. Amy is lost and scared and sad and confused and angry and upset and so very lost-

I think Lucie empathised with her in some way. Lucie is a free spirit. She lived travelling, she lived freedom. I imagine her childhood to be similar to Amys (before that entire trauma-fest). I think they all in a way see a part of themselves in Amy, who symbolises humanity in a way.

Freedom. Passion. Peace. Joy. Recklessness.

They cannot afford to have any of that here. Lucie wants to protect any of it that is left. She wants to leave too, to preserve her own humanity and life.

When Amy leaves Mikhail, Lucie is the only one rushing out to help her. She goes immediately, not a second delay. Amy has also started to trust her, so she plays along and is quiet no matter how confused she is. Lucie dies for Amy

Lucies last thoughts are not how she is happy that the others lived. She is regretful, she is mournful, because she wanted to survive with them. She wanted to leave with them. She wanted to survive.

She has lost everything she has stood for.

She can no longer travel, or explore, or theorise, or learn new things. She is bitter that she is going to die, yet despite that she chose NOT to sacrifice Amy for herself (unlike a CERTAIN SOMEONE *cough cough* Carol *cough cough*). That speaks volumes to me.

Lucie values herself, yet she chose Amy, a kid she met only a few hours ago and disliked at first. She faced torture. She didn't even get to die quickly, no, she was in horrible, excruciating pain before she blacked out and died.

I can't put it into words correctly how it makes me feel, and how I think of Lucie. Lucie did not want to sacrifice herself. She did not want to be a hero. She wanted to live, desperately. Yet in that final moment, where she could've lived, she chose to save someone else instead. I was fully expecting her to abandon Amy at the final moment. Yet she didn't....

And THIS, LADIES, GENTLEMEN AND OTHERS, is why we stan the QUEEN, BAGHERA HOLY SHIT.

*cough* yeah I have a lot of feelings about this. I might come back to it layer if I can find the words but i doubt it. Rip Lucie, the absolute GOAT of opq (I would say MVP too but that titles reserved for Jeffrey, I mean did you see him during the final part????? Holy shit) but yeah that

#ordem paranormal quarentena #opq #opq lucie #this is just a word dump s #dont expect it to be legible lol #it is 5 am #and i have thoughts #gg cellbit for decimating my sleep schedule for the next month

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devinescribe · 8 months ago

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I’m Right Here

Ch. 4 of “My Sunshine” [TreechxReader]

Warnings: Swearing, mention of Brandy’s body being hung up(it happened in the book), and I think that’s it?

The tributes stared in shock. You, a Capitol girl, stood in the middle of the zoo cage, apologizing. Apologizing for things you hadn't done. You just didn't know how to put your words together.

"For a minute- just a minute, I-i forgot where we were... I wasn't back home.... I forgot... that you're in the Hunger Games... and I feel like an ignorant fool. I-I shoulda... stopped her. Should've noticed... I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry," you weeped, falling to your knees.

It remained quiet for a bit, the only sound being your hiccups and apologies. Until you felt a hand on your shoulder. At first, you thought it was Treech. But it was too small.

You looked up and saw Dill.

"It's not your fault..." she whispered, her voice hoarse.

You stood up immediately, bringing her in to an embrace.

"You're a real sweet girl," you whispered.

How you hoped you didn't have to watch her die.

"I should be the one comforting you guys... I'm sorry for cryin' like that..." you said, a bit embarrassed of how you acted.

"You've got feelings too. Can't expect you to hide 'em... at least we know you're sorry," Lucy Gray said. The group hummed in agreement.

Soon they went away from the wall, going off to their own corners of the cage.

Treech pulled you away to a corner where Lamina was already sitting.

You remembered her slightly from schools. She was really quiet though, and you never really talked to her.

You felt Treech lay his head on your lap, and you took off his hat, placing it gently besides you. You then begsn to run your fingers through his hair, humming a song you two used to sing when you were kids. It was a lullaby. Soon he fell asleep.

"Today's the first day I've seen him smile," Lamina says, playing with her hair.

You look up at her, your (e/c) eyes meeting with her green ones with a confused look.

"After you left... he was a wreck. Inconsolable for weeks. Didn't really talk to anyone... he still doesn't. He goes off every day in those woods by himself, people say he's angry and that's why he gets so much wood... he don't talk much... but he's kind," she whispers.

"Lamina, I... I'm sorry I wasn't kind to you as a kid," you said.

It was her turn to be confused.

"I should've invited you to play with us... something," you said quietly.

"It's really no big deal. You're here now. And we're talkin' now... so the score is settled. Plus I finally got to taste those famous chocolate chip cookies he used to brag about gettin'. Ya know he was a little asshole," she giggled.

You gave a small laugh.

"I'm gonna hit the hay... good night," she said, laying down.

You smiled, waiting before hearing her soft snores. You softly moved Treech off of your lap, trying to not wake him up, but you failed, making him groan and whine.

"Nooo.... Come back," he mumbled, gripping onto your skirt.

He was like a five year old.

You lay besides him, and kept running your hand through his hair.

"Close your eyes, my love, so dear...Underneath the night so clear. Dream of worlds beyond this one, Where the gentle moon and stars do run. Rest your head upon my chest, Feel the rhythm, soft and blessed. In dreams, may this forever shine, In your heart, for all of time," you sang softly, watching a smile spread across his lips as he fell right back asleep.

You curled up besides him, falling asleep almost instantly.

The next morning you awoke due to some giggling. You groggily opened your eyes, groaning. In front of you, you saw Wovey. She was giggling. Then you saw Lucy Gray smiling. You thought she may have something to ask or say.

You tried to stand up, but then realized the weight on you.

"Oh how wonderful..." you mumbled.

When you were kids, falling asleep with Treech ended with you being squished. It was a death sentence if you had any important things to do that day because you were not leaving till he woke up.Not on purpose. But he was a dog. A puppy begging for attention.

His arms were wrapped around you, his head on your chest, half his body on top of you.

"Treech... hey... time to wake up," you said softly, shaking him awake softly.

He groaned and opened his eyes.

"Mind hoppin' off me? You ain't small no more. The difference is quite large," you said jokingly.

"Shit, sorry sunshine... oh fuck, sorry Wovey. I-"

You put a hand over his mouth.

"There we go. So pretty when you don't talk," you joked.

He pouted.

The peacekeepers came in and you stood up defensively, going to protect them.

"Ms. (L/N), it's time for you to head on home to change. You have interviews today," one spoke.

"She's... still going ahead?" You asked.

"With interviews. The games will be slightly delayed. It's alright, the Plinth Prize is still-"

"I don't give a damn 'bout some money I don't need," you interrupted.

You looked back at the tributes, and down to Treech. He looked sick. Like he was going to throw up.

"Alright, out," the peacekeeper said, grabbing your arm.

You ripped it away and they pointed their guns at your

"Just because you're Capitol now doesn't mean that everyone views you as such. They know you're just a district mutt, and won't mind seeing you shot dead after what happened yesterday," they spat.

You looked back, and to stop from any problems arising, you walked straight to the gate. The guard let you out. Looking back at the cage, you sighed.

—-

It had been a long day for you two. The long hike up to the lake, and then the swimming for hours.

You both sat under a tree, his head on your shoulder.

"That... song you sang the other night... what was it?" He asked.

"I made it up," you giggled, watching the sunset over the water. The pine trees on the other bank of the lake were illuminated in its golden light.

"That's... why I call you sunshine," he said, seemingly out of no where.

You turned to look at him confused.

"The way it lights up the trees... kinda like how you light me up... and it's pretty," he explained, giving a toothy grin.

——

You were at the Academy earlier than the rest of the people. Earlier than everyone except for Snow and Sejanus.

"You stayed there all night are you-"

"Fucking crazy? I'm district but-"

"No way I'm hell would I have stayed-"

"Shut up! Both of y'all..." you yelled, sitting in a chair across from them, laying your head in the table.

You felt a hand softly tap your arm three times.

'Are you ok.'

"I... I'm as ok as can be Sej..." you whispered, grabbing his hand."Y'know... for a while... I forgot they were tributes... forgot about the games... forgot where I was... I thought I had finally just woken up from the nightmare, and woken up back in Seven and Treech was dancin' with me for fun and games..."

The silence was deafening.

You could feel Sejanus's hand squeeze yours before tracing gentle patterns on it.

"These games aren't fair. They aren't... it's just killing kids to kill kids! For what? A punishment? It's disgusting," Sejanus was pissed off as he said this.

"You can't keep saying that you're going to get in trouble," Coryo hissed.

You hummed in agreement. You loved Sejanus. With all your heart, you loved Sejanus. But he was going to get himself killed. Some days you wondered if he was going to hate you as much as Capitol kids for not speaking up. You kept your head down on the table.

"I've... I've never seen you as happy as I did last night," Snow mused.

You nodded. You were happy. Before the incident, you had forgotten where you were.

"We aren't happy here in the Capitol, Coryo," Sejanus sighed, as he stood up walking next to you.

He looked so confused when you looked up. In his mind, the districts were full of people clamoring to kill each other, starving, like animals.

You sighed and sat up, putting your head on Sejanus's shoulder.

"Well... interviews are today... and so is Arachne's funeral... hey, Coryo, did you finish your assignment?" You mumbled, looking up at him.

He nodded and pulled out the folder he had placed them in, his best handwriting scrawled across the parchment.

"Clemensia didn't write a word," you said, looking between him and the paper.

You could tell he as shifted uncomfortably in his seat, that you were correct. But he was going to lie and cover for Clemensia.

'Do not take the blame for someone who would throw you to the wolves if their life was in danger.'

——

"You're gonna get hurt climbin' up so high one day," Treech shouted up at you.

You had climbed a tall tree almost to the top.

"Nuh uh!" Was all you exclaimed before sitting on a branch.

He looked into the dense forest, studying the area around. It was quiet. Almost too quiet. He had grown accustomed to the sound of birds and the rustling of the leaves, but it was completely and utterly silent.

"(N/N)... I don't like this..." he called up to you. "It's too quiet, come on let's go."

He heard you huff and yell out a 'fine'

Soon you were back down on the forest floor and your hand was in his hand, he started taking you back. He really did not feel good about right now. He knew the only time the woods went quiet was when there was either a big storm coming or predators. Big ones. Or large groups of them.

But he'd never felt scared to encounter a predator. This must be something else completely.

"You worry too much," you whispered as you walked back through the woods into town. He kept looking back behind you.

You heard a voice call out and then some footsteps. Treech definitely did not like that. He dragged you to a tree, urging you to climb.

You wanted to be snarky and say something like "oh now I can climb" but you didn't, seeing the fear in his eyes. You quickly climbed the tree, him right behind you.

Sitting in the branch, right next to him. He pulled you close and did a shushing motion.

Once again stuck in a tree as soldiers passed under you. You felt something cold go over your legs and then felt something tickling your chin. You looked down and saw a snake. Your eyes widened and you tried your hardest to not scream. It wasn't big. But it was a venomous one.

In a swift motion, Treech pulled it off, throwing it down.

You both heard a scream and looked down. You both squished together as the soldier looked up. You swore your eyes met his.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Fucking tree snake," the soldier said, keeping his gaze on you.

Whether he saw you or not, you didn't know.

The soldiers passed and you waited for a few moments after.

Maybe the people in the Capitol were not all horrible.

——-

The people in the Capitol were all horrible.

The interviews had been pushed back.

You first had to go the Arachne’s funeral. They asked Coriolanus to sing the anthem and so he did.

Suddenly you felt Sejanus grab your arm, “don’t look.”

You wished you would have listened. You wished you had just kept your head down in mourning. But you didn’t.

You looked up and saw Brandy strung up, her corpse as some sort of decoration.

You gasped, and immediately started bawling your eyes out, hiding your face in Sejanus’s chest. Many people thought you were crying tears for Arachne. Which in part was true because you didn’t wish death upon anyone.

But the reason you were so upset was Brandy. They had removed her pretty scarf and sweater that you had buttoned last night. The way they had her strung up for everyone to see. She was just a kid. Like you.

“S-she’s cold,” you whispered in between your sobs to Sejanus.

“Heart wrenching stuff here. (Y/N) mourning the loss of her friend Arachne and-“

You couldn’t listen to this. You walked out sobbing, and Sejanus came behind you.

Maybe they would think you were so overcome by grief of Arachne being gone. But you were not mourning Arachne’s death. The entirety of the Capitol would already be doing that. You would be mourning Brandy, a girl who died without even stepping foot into the arena.

“I-I can’t I can’t- I thought I could-“ you cry as Sejanus wraps his arms around you, your tears soaking into his uniform.

There were, of course camera people outside who recorded you, sobbing into the arms of your friend.

“You’re going to be ok… it’s ok, just breathe,” he mumbled.

“I-it’s not fair… how could they do that? That’s someone’s daughter…” you whispered through sniffles.

You didn’t want the people filming to record your words. You wished they would stop.

_-_-_-_

Treech watched the TV that all the tributes were forced to see. He didn’t know what was going on, but decided watching it was better than sitting bored.

He couldn’t have been more wrong

He should have known. He should have known that when they forced them to watch the TV that it wasn’t going to be anything good.

A gasp was ripped from his throat as he looked down, unable to watch the horrific thing they had done.

One tribute threw up. Some started crying.

He heard crying coming from the TV and his head shot up. He knew that crying. His eyes searched the TV until saw you walking out with the boy you called ‘Sejanus’ tailing after you.

The camera quickly cut to outside in the hallway where he saw Sejanus wrap his arms around you. He couldn’t help but feel a gnawing sense of jealousy. He was upset about the situation as it was, but it added to it. He couldn’t even stop her crying. Why were the cameras filming for so long on her?

He didn’t realize how hard his fists were clenched until the end of the broadcast. As soon as the TV shut off, his shoulders slumped and he looked down at his hands. He had crescent shaped dents, a small bit of blood from one of his hands from how hard he had been clenching his fists.

#×reader #treech tbosas #treech x reader #Ooh jealous jealous jealous boyyy #hehe they’re so cute #coriolanus snow #sejanus plinth #Sej is just a friend guys I promise he is not a love interest at all #Coryo is such an asshole 🙄

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lagingersnapz · 3 months ago

Text

Some Rain Must Fall - (Fallout Fic) Chapter 11: A Mapping of Scars

Chapter: 11/?

After Cooper wakes Lucy up from a nightmare, the two of them have a conversation about the time Cooper tried to sell her for vials.

Characters: Lucy MacLean/Cooper Howard(The Ghoul), Dogmeat(CX-404), Original Characters

Word Count: 3482

Warnings: Violence, Swearing

Author's Note: I have no idea what to say. I am so tired right now. Some downtime in my morning. Sipping on hot cocoa because coffee doesn't do jack for me. I can barely see from the fatigue. There's probably errors everywhere. Tunnel vision. Hazbin Hotel soundtrack. Remember me. Also I hope you enjoy the chapter.

Previous Next

Ao3

~~~

Cooper lay in a Vault-Tec Vault, in a Vault-Tec bed, wearing Vault-Tec pajamas, with a Vault-Dweller curled up against his side. If ever there was a time to reflect on things, this was it. Specifically, Cooper decided to try and dissect the impulses he was starting to feel in regards to Lucy. He wasn’t surprised, exactly, that there might be a little bit of an attraction forming on his side of things. He’d always been drawn to strong women; Barb had been strong, too. But as far as following through with any of these feelings or impulses, Cooper knew he absolutely could not let it happen.

Finding himself a partner had been so far off of his radar that it had never even come to mind. When he had realized that the radiation was changing him, rather than killing him, he had despaired. For a few years, Cooper had wallowed in pity for himself, wishing he was dead. Janey’s look of confusion when Barb took her but left him haunted him. After awhile, Cooper decided that he needed to make sure Janey was still okay.

When he returned to the Vault he had left them in, he found it damaged and abandoned. Cooper had spent over a month, combing the Vault from top to bottom looking for signs of Janey and Barb. In the end he had managed to get into one of the working terminals and found logs saying that those who had been living in the Vault were being moved, but it didn’t say where they were going. One thing Cooper knew was that neither Janey or Barb were there, so they must have been moved. And so his new goal in life was set: he would do everything and anything to find Janey again.

Lucy had set him completely off track in his goals. When he had first found her, Cooper thought she might be a solution to his problems in a way. The daughter of someone he had known before the war and of someone who had worked directly for Barb? Sometimes the world felt like an awfully small place. If anyone would know where Barb was, and by extension Janey, it would be Henry MacLean. If Cooper followed Lucy, he knew he would catch up with him eventually. And then he had lost track of her at the Super Duper Mart.

“How the fuck did I end up here?” he breathed out again, repeating the question he’d asked before Lucy had fallen asleep. The familiar frustration and anger stirred in his chest. He’d been so overwhelmed lately that it hadn’t had a chance to really sink in just how crazy things had gotten. The rule of there only being one pace was so far out the window he couldn’t even see it anymore. And as far as Lucy doing what he said when he said it… Cooper shifted in his lovely new Vault-Tec pajamas. This was bullshit.

Eventually Cooper felt himself starting to fall asleep. The days had been hectic enough to wear him out, and there was nothing better to do. If he kept thinking about how fucked up everything had become, he’d just get more and more angry without any outlet for it. It was Lucy’s sob that woke him back up. She was still pressed against his side, her face buried against his ribs, one hand clutching the fabric of his shirt. A shudder ran down the length of her body, and her breath hitched.

“Hey, Sweetheart?” Cooper didn’t bother with a quiet voice. It was obvious she was in the grips of a nightmare–so much for his presence being calming for her–the least he could do was wake her up. Easing his arm out from under her he sat up, reaching down to shake her by the shoulders. “Lucy?”

Lucy’s eyes flew open and she let out a strangled shriek. Her arms came up and she shoved him harder than Cooper expected, sending him off balance. His first instinct was to grab her wrists and stop her from trying to strike him until her brain caught up with the fact that she was awake now, but he suspected restraining her would only make her panic further, so instead he put an arm over his face to protect it.

Lucy was up quickly, throwing a leg over him so she could pin him down and raising her fist up to strike him, while the other shoved his arm out of the way. Then she paused, breathing hard, and in the darkness Cooper saw her looking around. Ghoul eyes worked better than human ones did in the dark, so he knew she couldn’t spot anything familiar around them like he could.

“Wyatt?” Lucy asked, voice thick. Her breath hitched, and he felt her body relax on top of his. “Cooper.” This time it wasn’t a question. She must have remembered where she was and who he was. Cooper’s arm fell away from his face and he looked up at her.

“You alright?” he asked.

Lucy took a deep breath, shoving both hands back through her hair to push it out of her face. “Yeah, I’m…” She trailed off, looking around at the room. “I forgot where I was. I thought we were still outside. I thought…” She shivered, resting one hand against his stomach and rubbing at her eyes with the other. “Damn it.” Looking down, she realized how she was sitting and shifted, pulling herself away from him. “Sorry. I was having a nightmare.”

Cooper snorted. “Yeah, no shit.” He moved to sit up, scooting himself back against the headboard of the bed. “Wanna tell me about it?”

Lucy settled herself next to him, straightening her tank top which had become dangerously askew during her moment of panic, then leaned heavily against the headboard as well. “I don’t think there’s much to tell. It was a bunch of things.”

“Like..?” Cooper prompted.

“Mostly it was people. Max, Irene, Monty, Rob, Ellie, Moldaver, my mom.”

“Shit, Sweetheart, that’s a hell of a list,” Cooper tried to make his voice light. Part of him wanted to reiterate that the surface wasn’t gentle and that these losses were to be expected and that she should just get used to it like he had. But a much bigger part of himself didn’t want Lucy to become like he had, so he kept it to himself. “That Max fella wasn’t dead when you left him though, right? Should he really be on that list?”

Lucy cast him an annoyed glance. “Oh, I’m sorry. Let me just tell my subconscious to stop feeling guilty about abandoning Max, since at least he wasn’t dead yet like the others were.”

Cooper hummed. “Ah, so it’s a list of people to feel guilty over, is it?”

“Not all of them. I don’t feel guilty about Monty.”

“So why’d he make the list? Who’s Monty?”

Lucy bit her lip, clearly thinking over what to say. Her answer couldn’t have been more surprising.

“Monty’s my husband.”

***

Lucy knew she had to amend her statement as soon as it left her lips. “Well, he was my husband. Until he tried to kill me and my dad drowned him in some pickles.” She turned her head to look at Cooper and found him looking right back at her. The room was dark, but her eyes had started to adjust, and she could see the confused twist of his mouth.

“There’s a lot to unpack there,” he finally said. Lucy snorted.

“Not as much as you probably think. We thought we were trading with a neighboring Vault to get me a husband, but they ended up being raiders led by Moldaver. They killed a bunch of our people and kidnapped my dad. Monty didn’t try and kill me until later, after the wedding, when he had me alone. Stabbed me right here.” She raised a hand to the scar on her side.

Cooper cleared his throat. “And you said your daddy did what, now?”

Lucy picked at the blanket she had pulled back up into her lap. “Well, I thought I killed Monty in our housing unit, so I went to help the rest of my Vault, but he came back and tried to kill me a second time. My dad showed up and hit him with a shovel, then drowned him in a barrel of pickles.”

Letting out a low whistle, Cooper shook his head. “Well, god damn. Gotta say, I don’t think much o’ your daddy, but I can’t fault him for his reaction. If someone ever tried to do anything like that to J-” He cut himself off abruptly, but Lucy had turned to look at him as intently as she could in the dark room. He had mentioned family before, his reason for surviving so long was apparently the ongoing search for them, but beyond that he had had a wife before, she didn’t know anything about them. For as much as her dad talked about Cooper Howard, he had never mentioned a family.

“Sorry, Sweetheart. Ain’t ready to go down that road, yet.” He was quiet, almost whispering, but she heard a depth of emotion in his voice that betrayed his unease.

Lucy reached over and patted him on the leg. “Don’t worry, Wyatt. You don’t have to talk about it if you aren’t ready.” They sat in silence for awhile, and Lucy tried to forget her nightmare. Once she had woken up she had forgotten most of the details, but she knew she had seen the faces of a lot of the people that had been lost.

Eventually her eyelids started to feel heavy again, and she leaned over, putting her head on Cooper’s shoulder. “Thanks for waking me up. Sorry I jumped on you.” She felt Cooper shift a little bit.

“‘Course, Darlin’. And no worries. Ain’t the first time someone’s jumped on me like that.”

Lucy thought of how she’d been perched on top of him and chuckled a little, but chose not to say anything else about that. “Can you talk to me about something?”

Cooper shifted, moving so the two of them were laying down again rather than sitting against the headboard. “About what?”

Lucy managed a little shrug from her place nestled at his side. “I don’t know. Anything. Just talk so that the last thing I’m thinking about isn’t my nightmare again.” She could hear his heart beating in his chest, a slow, steady rhythm, and when Cooper hummed thoughtfully she felt it against her cheek.

“Remember the Super Duper Mart?” he finally asked.

“I thought you were gonna distract me from my nightmares,” Lucy said dryly.

“Well, I figured there was something you should know about that whole clusterfuck.”

“Okay, and what’s that?”

“I wasn’t gonna leave you there.”

Lucy’s mouth twisted in confusion and she propped herself up on her elbow so she could look down at his face. She wanted to be sure he saw the disbelief plastered over her features. “You remember that you sent me inside to have my organs harvested, right?”

“Well,” Cooper started, drawing the word out, “normally they don’t get right to the harvestin’. I was gonna get my vials and come right back in to get you, but they took their sweet time delivering on their end of the bargain.”

The skepticism on her face must have been plain, because Cooper continued with his explanation.

“Not out of kindness or no Golden Rule bullshit, but because by that point I figured maybe you really were related to ol’ Henry MacLean, and I wanted to have a word with him. Plus you had that handy little tracker for the head strapped to your wrist. Needed to keep you close.”

It took a moment for Lucy to digest this. “So, you were going to pretend to sell me to organ harvesters, which I thought was going to be sex slavery, by the way, until the robot clarified things for me, and then you were going to break in and steal from the organ harvesters afterwards?”

Cooper made a little strangled sound in the back of his throat. “You make it sound like stealing from people who sell organs is a bad thing. And hold on, you thought I was selling you to be a sex slave ?” He sat up again, looking down at her until Lucy sat all the way back up as well.

“Well, I mean, what was I supposed to think?! You were selling me! I’d never exactly been sold before.”

“Holy fuckin’ shit. I can’t believe you didn’t scatter my brains across the dirt when you had the chance that day.”

The two of them sat there, staring at each other for several long breaths until Cooper let out a heavy sigh and laid back down, putting a hand over his eyes and rubbing like he had a headache. Lucy didn’t lay back down yet.

“How many other people have you sold to them before?” The conversation from before came back to her. She knew he had done plenty of bad things in his time, but how many people had he traded to death so he could stay alive? Was he responsible for any of the other ghouls she saw locked up in there?

“I fucking didn’t.” Now Cooper sounded genuinely angry. “I done a lot of bad shit, but I’ve never sold an actual person before, Ms. MacLean. I just knew they did that shit there. I’ve traded for vials with caps and other drugs before.” Cooper growled in the back of his throat and then pushed the blankets away from him, standing up and pacing for a second. “Fuck, what the fuck am I even doing here right now? I said there’d be one pace, and here I fucking am, getting nowhere and being sidetracked by every other’s person’s goddamn problems in the Wasteland but my own.”

Turning to the doorway, he reached down, pulling off his shirt as he went. “Where’s the damn laundry? I’m putting my actual clothes back on. This is ridiculous.”

Lucy scrambled out of bed to follow him, picking up the shirt he had left on the floor. “Cooper, wait.” She reached out to put a hand on his shoulder but he spun, grabbing her by the wrist to stop her from touching him, and stepping her backwards until her back bumped into the wall and she was looking at him wide-eyed.

“I told you not to call me that here.” His face was dark, but Lucy could tell there was more going on under the surface than outrage at her for thinking he was selling her. Though that wasn’t all that had her attention. The lighting in the living room of the unit was brighter than the bedroom had been, and with the shirt off, Lucy got her first good look at Cooper’s skin. He was usually so careful about keeping himself covered that all she had seen before was his head and hands. Even when he had been butchering the frogs he hadn’t so much as pushed up his sleeves.

The flesh of his torso looked burned, like his face, and was covered in scars. Long slashes from blades and more healed bullet wounds than Lucy could count in that moment, some fresh enough that she knew they must have come from the fight with the raiders. Though Cooper kept a firm hold of one of her wrists, pressing it back against the wall next to her head, Lucy dropped the shirt from her free hand, raising it to touch one of the more recent wounds. Cooper flinched at the contact, his breathing a little ragged, but he didn’t say anything, didn’t move to stop her, letting her map out the scars.

As her fingers explored, Cooper moved ever so slightly closer, and she noticed his eyes drop to watch her hand. Under some of the scar tissue she felt the hardness of what must have been old bullets still lodged in his body. Was his whole body like this? An unhappy story mapped out across his skin for the rest of his life?

“Please stay,” Lucy’s voice was quiet, like she was talking to a frightened animal, and she looked back up to his face, leaving her fingertips against the skin of his chest. The scar tissue almost burned under her touch. She wanted to ask him about them, where he had gotten them and if he remembered the first one. Were they all from after the bombs dropped, or were some of them from the war he’d fought in before the world ended?

Slowly, Cooper’s grip on her wrist relaxed, until he finally let go of her, keeping his hand braced on the wall instead. Lucy didn’t move yet, waiting for his breathing to slow back down, noticing that her own had picked up too. Their eyes locked, and Cooper started to lean forward. For a second, Lucy thought he was going to try kissing her, and in that second she wondered if she would have let him. The air felt charged in a way she hadn’t noticed before. Yes, she decided. If he wanted to kiss her, she’d let him. Maybe she even wanted him to. The thought felt like an immediate betrayal of Max, but Lucy tried to ignore the sudden twist of guilt in her stomach.

Instead of trying to kiss her, Cooper’s eyes closed and he leaned his forehead against hers, drawing in a deep breath through the hole where his nose would have been and letting it out slowly from his mouth. They both stood like that for awhile, heartbeats settling and breath slowing. It felt like a wordless apology between them. Eventually though, Cooper moved back again, and his hand fell away from the wall.

“Come on,” Lucy said, stooping down to pick up the dropped shirt. Then, taking his hand in hers, she slowly eased back towards the bedroom. “We’ve all been through a lot. We need sleep.”

Cooper let her lead him back into the room, and when she offered the shirt he took it wordlessly, looking at it for a heartbeat before he put it back on, hiding his torso from view again. Lucy crawled under the blankets, looking at him expectantly. Eventually Cooper joined her, though this time she was determined to give him some space. At least until he moved his arm, silently inviting her back to his side. Gratefully, Lucy accepted the invitation. Whether he believed it or not, his presence did help, and she’d prefer having the human contact over laying there alone.

This time it was Lucy who waited awake until she heard the sound of Cooper’s breathing become slow and even before letting herself drift off. Eventually she was woken again by the artificial sunlight coming in through the fake window set into the wall. With a groan, Lucy shifted. As she slept she had rolled over, and now instead of her being pressed to Cooper’s side, he was pressed up to her back, his arm wrapped around her waist. Her movement apparently woke Cooper as well, because he snatched his arm back and rolled back away from her like he was expecting her to bite him. Lucy could guess why.

“No need to worry. It’s a perfectly normal thing to have happen in the mornings,” she chirped, hopping to her feet.

“Christ, Sweetheart, I don’t need you to tell me how my body works,” Cooper grumbled. His agitation just made her smile. After their little argument last night, she had been worried what would happen when they woke up. Would he get up and immediately leave? Would things be awkward between them? Her fears were apparently unfounded, because Cooper was still here, and he sounded like his usual self.

“Okey-dokey.” Lucy left the bedroom, finding Dogmeat and the kids in the living room, already watching the TV, an open box of Sugar Bombs in front of them.

For the next hour, Lucy let herself play pretend. As she cooked breakfast, she let herself pretend this was Vault 33. The marriage trade had played out perfectly and she had been married for years now. This breakfast was for her family: herself, her husband, and their children. What surprised her about her little fantasy was that her partner in it wasn’t Max, but rather Cooper Howard. Not Cooper Howard from the movies, but the one she knew now, sour temper, no nose, burned skin and all.

The ridiculousness of this little daydream was driven home as they were eating, and Kelly set down her forkful of powdered eggs with a sharp clatter. Her eyebrows were drawn down sharply, and she looked Lucy straight in the eyes.

“I want to go with you and Wyatt,” she announced, and the room went quiet.

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hirik0 · 8 months ago

Text

Back to you part 6

Makarov/Yuri

When Yuri wakes up he's in an awful mode his alarm is way to loud and happend way to early. Working for Makarov? Forget it! Why did he even thought that's a good idea in the first place? This also means his plan to get Jack a phishing link also needs to change, god fucking damm it. He groans covering his eyes with his left arm, the sun is to bright, he sleeped to less, his throat hurt and has a cut and he has a video call with his lawyer in 30 minutes and the worst problem he has is that Makarov will be at his doorstep or a killer send by him at anytime. He more falls out the bad then rolling and he just want to sleep a littel longer. First thing he needs to cover the bandags around his throat, like his laywer can't see this, so he searches for a scarf or a turtle neck in his closet, nearly not finding either. In his hast he nearly dressed in the dress shirt with blood on the collar. Rushing half dressed, who needs pants if everybody is only seeing the upper half of your body, to the kitchen, where he nearly drops his full coffee cup. He will go back to bed after this call, nothing good will happen to him today. The call also starts in the worst way possible, his laywer looking clearly displeased before she drops this bomb question on him. "Did you sent anyone to intimate your husband?", Lucy Harris is asking him looking angry. "No", Yuri answers being confused by the question, to tiered to even entertain whi she even could refer too. "Well I had a phone call if your ex husbands laywer yesterday and they told me that you sent somebody to provoke him in his favourite bar to get a better case to divorce him." Yuri frowns taking a sip of his coffee trying to get his brain to work. "When was that?", he asks he would remeber if he ask anybody to do this. "The night you were in Moscow with your old friend." Yuris frown gets bigger at this what is she talking about. The realisation hits him like a train, she's talking about Makarov. "I never asked anybody to piss of Jack. If this person was there it was their desition and I don't have anything to do with it." "Well it would be good when it don't happen again." "Of course, I will talk to him." A fat lie because Makarov would do it anyway, especially now that they are fighting. "Good, well they are still push the dates for mediation around so their is honestly not much we can do for now, I can complain to the court over this of course, but I don't think it's to much if an issue now", she explains and Yuri just nods along money is not really an issue sure it sucks but thanks to Zakheav he actually has some really good paying jobs on the line. He also needs the time to adjust his plan now that... oh oh genius of course that can work perfectly. Getting Makarov of Jack with the fake Instagram perfect genius, if he dont get killed later this day. "Of course that sounds great", Yuri says to something he only half listened. And soon after the call ends, what means he can just go back to sleep for few more hours or till Makarov kills him.

Makarov didn't even sleep yet, breathing hurts and well nobody said he can't do work from the bed. So just simply started working. Going through the information he had on the last gig before 141, Europoles new wunder weapon against organisation crime, fucking losers in his opinion, confiscated half of his weapon shipment. Who was on it, who know what who is the mole? He even didn't most analog, do no text, no mails and somebody still got information out, the tablet he uses right now can't even connect to the Internet. Oh this rat will suffer, touring him will be so fun, so satisfying, but he first need to smoke them out. His eye burn from exhaustion, he's getting a nasty stress headache. Circulation a few false information, drawing the circel closer and closer like a shark swimming around a seal hiding on a rock, before taking the lethal bit. But he also need somebody on the outside, somebody that can keep track of what false information is circulating and who was told what, he can always ask Milena he made her husband fall on a knife 8 time after all and she is also profiting from his buisness in more indirect ways, but he dont want to. Everyone knows that he and Milena are close so his men will be careful around her he needs a new face. He lets himself fall back against the pillows when his mind sets on Yuri. Yuri would be perfect, few people know him, he could join easly, well till last night he would say he can trust him, but not with the Zahkeav situation. He's honestly not even angry at Yuri anymore well maybe still a littel bit, but he's now mostly angry at Victor Zakhaev how did he even found Yuri? Depending on what he will learn at 3 pm there are probably a lot of persons trying to recruit Yuri to work for them exclusively. But Yuri is his, only his.

He sits in his office the pain meds finaly working. Waiting for Paval, his man for cyber crime what makes a good stable amount of money every year. Yuri claimed he sometimes sold to Pavel and well truth soon will be discovered. Pavel looks pale when he walks in as to be aspected, being called in by the boss with out given a reason is usally a very bad sign. His hands are slightly shaking when he sits down ready to throw a subordinate under the bus if needed. "What can you tell me over the Magpie, Pavel?", Makarov asks enjoying the effect he has on the other man. "His malware is amazing, but the windows you can buy from him are rare, he sometimes even offers to write custom programs for the right amount of money, but nobodyever could confirm that. His work is good, he's on time, I always buy something when his shop is open." Makarov nods along so if Yuri is who he claims to be he is a very valuable asset to the organisation. "What do you know about him?" Pavel frowns that is the whole point of him only selling a few times a year is to make sure he can't be found that easy, there is only one think that is seen as confirmed that he must work on cyber security. A insider making money on the side with crime. "He works in cyber security, besides that he's hiding his identity very well. Makarov frowns at this so how did Zakheav found him then? Pavel starts to sweat under the angry gaze of his boss, not sure if he is of the hook or not. "Would you reconices his work?", Makarov asks having to suppress a yawn, he needs more coffee. "I even have some of his latest work to directly compare it to anyone that claims to be the Magpie", Pavel nearly wispers not wanting to unleash Makarovs anger on himself. "Perfect, be prepared to do so, you can go now." With this Makarov dismisses Pavel who has the feeling he's a gazelle getting away from a very hungry lion. So he walks out of the place as fast as he can without looking like he's running. Makarov makes himself another coffee he really wants a drink, but he don't mixes medication with alcohol, the risk of accidently killing himself out of stupidity. That would be embarrassing because he's the man with at least 5 back up plans, the man that knows how to use legal grey zones for his advantage, the one never been pinned down for the big crimes, always getting away. Not for a lag of trying and the 141 is becoming a pain in his ass, Captain John Price had a interesting team. His attack dog Simon 'Ghost' Riley who lost his whole family because of a cartel, Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick his protégé since he finished college with degree in forensics, the hard to kill Gary 'Roach' Sanderson who lost his voice in a undercover mission he barely survived and the new guy John 'Soap' MacTavish who before worked in the bomb squad. Not to forget his supporters behind the scenes Nikolai somebody that left crime to become a police officer, Kate Laswell and Alex Keller that are their contacts to Interpol, Shepard leader of a anti drug unit of the several US agencies and his attack dog Graves who is in lead in the fight against Mexican Cartels.

He takes a sip from his coffee if he had to bet money on it he would put it on Graves having installed a mole. He's actually know for doing highly questionable undercover missions, most aren't as lucky a Sanderson and survive when the cover is ultimately blown. 141 stared to target him around 7 months, ruining plans of his all over Europe, but the mole must be here for longer. Makarov knows the failing rate for new people to join his organisation is around 70%, most of them die, the next biggest reason he rejects them because their work is bad, they are unreliable, some cracking under the pressure of police when all they have to do is shut their stupid mouth. So for somebody to get this high to get that valueable information to seriously hurting his organisation they must work for him for nearly two years, must be working directly under one of his Lieutenants. His coffee mug is half empty and the damm drink can't keep his exhaustion at bay anymore. He can visit Yuri after he sleeped, making a strategic move tiered can end disaster because Yuri is probably well rested by now and would likely not put up a fight this time. Also when he breaks into Yuris place at a unsuspected time or when Yuri is asleep he has the uper hand.

Yuri is still tiered when he wakes up again in the late afternoon. He is still alive, what don't mean that Makarov is not in his living room when he leaves his bed room. But their is no Makarov in his living room waiting for him, what honestly is worse, if the other Russian would be in his place he atleast knows he is about to die. Now he hast to wait, he turns on his laptop so he can check his mails. He puts a pizza in the oven because well he need to eat. Before laughing at his silly thought, you can just text Makarov and ask. While waiting for his pizza he checks over his mails, seeing a familiar mail address from work. Kate Laswell wrote him, he frowns should he read it, should he just delete it? He can still delete it after reading. He already cringes when he reads the first part of the mail. Sure Kate probably don't know he's divorcing their interaction were always exclusively business.

Dear Mr. Blaire,

Mrs Potter was so friendly to give me your new business mail address. We were very grateful if we could still use your expirince for some of our cases, please send me a list with your prices as soon as possible.

Regards

Kate Laswell

He looks dumbfounded at the mail for a while. He never planned to keep working in cyber security, did he told that his colleagues sure, but it was a lie. Also of course Alice gave out his e-mail out, one he also only uses to keep the lie from being to obvious. He thinks about simply deleting the mail account, does he really still need it? It would be foolish to keep the account now that he has the first profitable jobs to modify certain malware and bots for the people Zahheav introduced him. The smell of pizza is slowly filling the room so he takes a look at it, the cheese isn't melded enough for him. When he goes back to his laptop he nearly clicks delete account when he rembers he also gave this mail also to his lawyer. So he does the next best think blocking Laswell and deleting her mail with out answering. This is probably something he should talk with Makarov about if ge survives the fight ring problem. After getting the pizza out if the oven he grabs his phone opening his chat with Makarov. Seeing his drink text from the night in Moscow with Milena and he laughts at the absurdity on how their relationship did a 180 by now. He still sends the silly text he about Makarov killing him.

Yuri: you decided on killing me yet or can I do work?

Its such a stupid text, why did he even send it? He bits in his pizza the cheese and tomato sauce burning his mouth. Great really a bad day, he sits down on his couch laptop on his lap pizza on the couch table and it's fucking nostalgic. He can't even recall how often Makarov, Milena and him sat after university together in a living room all doing homework and complain about it. How often they would ask Makarov about the law, how often he helped Milena with the math for her buisness degree how often the other looked over his code to find the one missing semicolon so the code would work. He was happy back then. All of them working their ass of in university at day and at the fighting ring at night to finance their degrees. Then Jack happened and Makarov and Milena stayed away, because they could not stand his boyfriend. How they would fight, because of Jack their friendship crumbling honestly a wonder they even came to the wedding. But now after all this time after he came back it don't feel like things never changed, like Jack never happened, well besides Makarov maybe killing him after he already gave him a unheard second chance he won't get a third.

Makarov: Andrei will come by and you will give him an USB-stick with some of your code for comparison

Y: you can read code by now?

M: I have people for that

Y: of course you have

Yuri sighs so his contact person in Makarovs organisation want to see some of his work, to compare to what he sells. He rolls his eyes coding a classic first generation malware. He eats the next slice of pizza thinking what to do add to it to give it his spin. Something that screams Magpie. Mid chew he knows exactly what to do. Does he have to prove to his claim of being the Magpie sure to a stranger, but he also can do something that Makarov knows from back in universety.

#call of duty #makayuri #vladimir makarov #cod yuri

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